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为什么老朋友重要 – 译学馆
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为什么老朋友重要

Why Old Friends Matter

我们与一些人成为朋友 是因为一个重要却经常被歪解或忽略的原因
There are people we are friends with for one major but often maligned or overlooked reason.
因为我们过去曾是朋友
Because we were friends with them some time ago.
可能在几十年前的某个阶段 我们有许多共同点
At one stage, it might be decades ago now, we had a lot in common.
我们都擅长数学 但法语成绩很烂 都喜欢打乒乓球
We were both good at math, but bad at French at school, and had shared liking for table tennis;
在大学时 我们的寝室挨得很近
or we had adjacent rooms at college,
在学习上我们互相帮助
used to help each other with assignments,
在约会失败或父母令人抓狂的时候 在酒吧借酒消愁 互相安慰
and commiserate in the bar about failed dates or maddening parents;
或可能同在一家大公司做实习生
or maybe we were interns in the same big firm,
觉得我们的上司性情古怪且脾气暴躁
with the same as we thought at the time bizarre and intemperate boss.
但生活最终让我们分道扬镳
But life has taken us on radically different courses.
而现在 有的人已经有了三个小孩
Now they’ve got three young children.
有的人搬到了奥克尼群岛 在那经营了一家渔场
They moved to the Orkneys, where they’re managing a fish farm;
或者从政 成为副部长
or they’ve gone into politics and have become a junior minister;
或在洛基山那儿做滑雪教练
or they’re working as a ski teacher in the Rocky Mountains.
我们的生活可能相隔万里
The daily realities of our lives may be miles apart.
我们也许对彼此的生活知之甚少
We may know little of their world, and they of ours.
如果我们今日才认识的话 彼此会感到愉快 但不会成为密友
If we were introduced today, we think each other pleasant enough, but would never get close.
和老朋友重新取得联系很有帮助并能挽回彼此
Yet it can be hugely helpful and very redemptive to catch up with these people,
我们单独用餐 在森林漫步 或者偶尔发邮件
with a one-on-one dinner, a walk in the woods, or the occasional email.
这些老朋友让我们想起曾经熟悉的 越来越疏离的自己
These friends function as conduits to earlier versions of ourselves that are inaccessible day to day,
但却蕴含十分重要的洞察力
but that contain hugely important insights.
在老朋友的陪伴下 我们回顾曾经一起走过的路
In the company of the old friend, we take stock of the journey we have traveled.
回顾在成长过程中那些痛苦又珍贵的回忆
We get to see how we’ve evolved, what was once painful, what mattered,
或者早已被忘却的快乐时光
or what we’ve wholly forgotten we deeply enjoyed.
老朋友是记忆的向导 而这些记忆可能渐渐被我们遗忘了
The old friend is a guardian of memories on which we might otherwise have a damagingly tenuous hold.
由于人本性的极端复杂性 我们需要老朋友
We need old friends, because of a crucial complexity in human nature.
我们经历成长的不同阶段
We pass through stages of development.
长大后 我们会抛弃以往的美好回忆 并可能对过去发生的种种越来越缺乏共鸣了
And as we do so, we discard previous concerns, and may develop a lack of empathy around past perspectives.
14岁时 我们总埋怨自己的父母
At 14, we knew a lot about resenting our parents.
20年后 这些叛逆的想法听起来却是荒唐和忘恩负义的
Twenty years later, the whole idea sounds absurd and ungrateful,
但老朋友会让我们在微妙的氛围中又联系在了一起
yet the old friend reconnects us with a particular atmosphere.
就像小说家 让我们在家中扮演年少的自己
And like a novelist, makes us at home with a character,
也许那时的我们与现在截然不同
ourselves, who might otherwise, have seemed impossibly alien to us.
22岁时 我们觉得单身生活极度痛苦
At 22, we found single life extremely painful.
我们经常与某个朋友一起出去玩 分享一堆被迫单身和渴望脱单的想法
We hung out a lot with a particular friend, and shared a litany of wistful alienated thoughts.
45岁时 我们有了孩子 我们发现自己对想要重回单身产生较大兴趣
At 45, with a young family around us, we may find ourselves increasingly curious about being single again,
并且幻想着交友的乐趣
and fantasize about the joys of casual hookups.
老朋友也会给我们透露些“重要的讯息”
The old friend has crucial news to impart.
在过去几十年内 我们的生活存在着各不相同的观点
We experience life from a succession of very different vantage points over the decades,
但往往会把心思放在对未来的展望上 这是合乎情理的
but we tend understandably to be preoccupied only with a present vista,
忘记我们在早期经历里所获得的独特又不完整 却举足轻重的智慧
forgetting the particular incomplete but still crucial wisdom contained in earlier phases.
每个年龄段的人在某个领域中都会掌握精湛的专业知识
Every age possesses a superior kind of knowledge in some area or other,
而往往忘记用这些知识帮助我们走向成功
which then usually forgets to hand on to succeeding selves.
记得曾经的样子 而非我们现在的样子 这对我们的成长和正直的人格至关重要
Remembering what it was like, not to be who we are now, is vital to our growth and integrity.
最优秀的教授仍忠于自己的过往
The best professors remain friends with their past.
他们记得过去的样子 不了解他们特别的话题
They remember what it was like, not to know about their special topic,
所以 不要对他们的学生唠叨个没完
and so, don’t talk off the heads of their students.
优秀的老板会回忆起他们事业起步之时担任一个无足轻重的小雇员的那段经历
The best bosses are in touch with their own experience of starting out as a lowly employee.
优秀的政客仍会清晰地记得
The best politicians clearly recall periods in their lives,
那段他们所持有的政见与今日的想法截然不同的日子
when they held very different views to the ones they’ve now formulated,
这让他们得以劝说那些心怀敌意的选民 并对选民的观点感同身受
which allows them to persuade and empathize with hostile constituencies.
优秀的父母会
Good parents keep emotionally in touch
时不时感性地想起童年所感到的不公平待遇和敏感的经历
with the feelings of injustice and sensitivity they had in early childhood.
心怀善意的富人不会忘记那段
Kindly wealthy people remember what it was like
因害怕被人私下嘲笑而不敢步入一家高档的食品商店的经历
not to dare to walk into a fancy food shop for fear of being patronized.
我们一定会有一段更加长久的关系
And we are always better long-term lovers,
如果我们一直保持初见真爱时的忠诚
if we have an avenue of loyalty back to who we were when we first met our beloved,
面对伴侣也能怀着崇高的感恩之情和谦逊态度
and were at an apogee of gratitude and modesty.
老朋友是重要的“催化剂” 让我们发现自身有吸引力且有价值的一面
Old friends are key activators of fascinating and valuable parts of the self,
我们往往会遗忘在当下这个充满偏见的世界里真正需要的东西
that we need, but are always at risk of forgetting we need, in the blinkered present.
每周我们将会发布引人深思的视频
We publish new thought-provoking films every week.
请一定要订阅我们的频道哦
Be sure to subscribe to our channel.
并且打开屏幕上的链接观看我们所提供的内容
And take a look at more of what we have to offer at the link on your screen now.

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视频概述

我们在人生的不同阶段会遇到不同的朋友,而老朋友与我们之间分享着一段独特的回忆,与我们有着特别的情感连接。时间却让我们与老友分道扬镳,各走各道。我们应该时刻记得,老朋友是我们人生中重要的一部分,他们见证了我们的成长,人生的起起落落。我们对彼此有着一定的了解,在各自的心里有着不可替代的位置。我们要珍惜自己的老朋友。

听录译者

红花老七

翻译译者

Sara

审核员

审核员 V

视频来源

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EJJs0OALuW8

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