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为什么在节假日期间分手那么难

Why It's Impossible To Break Up With Someone During The Holidays [GEN WHY]

你曾有过在节假日期间与人分手的经历吗?
-Have you ever tried to break up with someone during the holidays?
不 没有 我会等到假期结束后再说
-No…no, no. I wait ‘tilafter.
所以……最近你和丹感情怎么样?
-So… how are things going withyou and Dan?
呃 我得和他分手
-Ugh. I have to break up withhim.
-你不能和他分手 现在是十一月! -怎么了?
-You can’t break up with him.It’s November! -So? -Breaking up with him now would be a complete derailment of his holiday cheer.
你现在和他分手就彻底毁了他过节的心情
我觉得他会撑过去的
-I think he’ll be fine.
你不懂 三年前 我朋友的 朋友的朋友的朋友
-You don’t understand. You don’t understand.Three years ago, a friend of a friend of a friend of a friend of
在圣诞节前夕分手了
mine got broken up with before Christmas,
直到现在每当她看见圣诞老人
and to this day she can not stop
就会止不住地哭泣
sobbing when she sees a mall Santa.
那太糟了 她就在圣诞节前分手的吗?
-That’s terrible. Was it rightbefore Christmas?
不 在十月份
-No, it was in October,
但是你也知道购物中心总会提前搬出圣诞老人
but you know how early they bring out the mall Santas.
好吧 所以 过完圣诞节再分手
-Okay, so, after Christmas? -No!
不行!让我来分析计算一下
So, I have to do some math.
让我看看……这是他
Alright let’s see… this is him.
-你是什么星座?-巨蟹座
-What’s your sign? -Cancer…
这就说得通了 我找到了
-That makes sense, that makessense.
你看 1月12日 这天绝对不行
I got it. So, Jan. 12, weestablish as a no go zone.
因为接下来是马丁·路德·金日
So that leads us to Martin Luther King day
不行……下一个
eh, can’t… next.
土拨鼠之日 全国爱宠物日 林肯诞辰 情人节
Groundhog Day? National LoveYour Pet Day… Lincoln’s Birthday… Valentine’s
Day.
夏令时 全国吃派节
Daylight Savings Time. NationalPie Day.
接下来看看……3月16日
Which leads us to…March 16.
可第二天就是圣帕特里克节!
-But that’s the day right beforeSt. Patrick’s Day.
没错 有什么比醉酒更好的方法
-Exactly! Because what better way to deal
来处理失恋吗?
with a breakup then a pub crawl?
好吧 那 我应该送什么圣诞礼物给他?
-Okay. So, what do I get him forChristmas?
你会因为在过节而不与某人分手吗
-Would you ever stay with somebody just because it was around the holiday time? -Yeah.
会的 在节假日与人分手真是太糟了
It sucks to break up withsomebody over the holidays.
所以 呃 我们就这样结束了
-So, um, guess that’s it then.
[叹气]没错
– [sighs] Yeah.
我能在贝基的派对上见到你吗?
-Am I going to see you atBecky’s party?
我们大概应该想想怎么样
-We should probably figure out how we ’re
在这些节日派对上避免碰面
going to split up the holiday parties. -Yeah.
好吧 噢 贝基比较好说话
Uh, Becky’s an easy one
你知道的 因为我和她一起工作
you know, ‘ cause I work with her.
然后是布莱克的桌上游戏之夜 而你讨厌桌游
-Then there’s Blake’s board gamenight, but you hate board games.
我只讨厌大富翁!好吧
-Only Monopoly! Okay.
那我要去苏的饼干烘焙聚会
But I get Sue’s cookiebake-off!
你知道我有多喜欢苏的曲奇饼!
-You know how much I love Sue’ssnickerdoodles! Okay,
好吧
fine.
然后还有杰克和蒂娜的丑毛衣派对
-And then there’s Jake andTina’s ugly sweater party.
蒂娜是我最好的朋友
-Tina is my best friend.
杰克是我最好的朋友
-Jake is my best friend.
你不是杰克最好的朋友!
-You’re not best friends withJake!
你们根本就不跟对方说话
You guys don’t even talkto each other.
你喜欢闲坐着 有时候看看体育
You, like, sit around and watchsports sometimes.
[叫喊声和争吵声]
[yelling and arguing]
够了!
-That’s enough!
节假日本该和你爱的人相聚在一起
The holidays are supposed to be about being with someone you love.
我们能不能成熟点?
Can we just be adults aboutthis?
把我们的纠纷放一边然后假装我们很爱彼此
Set aside our feelings aside and just pretend like we love each other?
我真的好喜欢苏的曲奇
-I do love Sue’s snickerdoodles.
行 那 我能进去吗?
-OK,then. Can I come backinside?
可以 我想……至少得等到一月份再分吧
Yeah I guess… At least untilJanuary.
噢 行 可以 先度过这个冬天吧
-Oh, yeah, that’s fine. Justhold out the winter in here.
就一个月
-One month at a time.
你家里人有没有试过 比你还喜欢你的对象?
-Did your family ever like someone more than you actually liked them at the time?
他们没有当着我的面说过 但我想应该有的
-They haven’t said it to myface, but probably, yeah.
你准备好了没
-Are you ready? -Yeah.
好了 你知道吗事实上 我在想……
You know actually, I was thinking…
要不然就说我生病了
what if we just say I’m sick and,
呃 然后别去了?
uh, don’t go?
别这样宝贝 宝贝 我爱你的父母
-Babe, no. Babe, babe — I loveyour parents!
【内心独白】:他们爱你!
– [internal dialogue]: Theylove you!
拜托 然后我告诉她 我说:“这就是为什么菠菜是绿色的”【笑声】
-Come on, and so I told her, Isaid “That’s why spinach is
green.” [laughter]
【内心独白】:又来了
– [internal dialogue]: Here wego again. It’s always
总是“噢 史蒂芬 你真幽默”
“ Oh, Stephen, you’re so funny.
“噢 史蒂芬 我想不到
“ Oh, Stephen, I can’t believe
你居然拯救了那些可怜挨饿的猫咪”
you rescued those poor starving kittens. ”
“噢 史蒂芬……噢 史蒂芬……” 呵!
“Oh, Stephen… Oh Stephen…” Ugh!
看看他是多么的自鸣得意
Look how smug he is.
我早就应该和他分手了 可我不能
I shouldjust break up with him already.
因为圣诞节 就要来了
— but I can’t because Christmas is around the corner, and I’ll never
我妈会对我喋喋不休念个没完
hear the end of it from my mother.
快看那! 就连狗狗都喜欢他!
Look at that! Even the dog loves him!
他是怎么回事?
What is it about him?
他根本就没有那么可爱啊
He’s not even that cute.
好吧……也许他是有一点可爱
Okay…maybe he is a little cute. No,
不 不!你知道吗?我受够了
NO! You know what?! I’ve hadenough.
是时候撕开创可贴 跟他说“再见 史蒂芬”
It’s time to rip off the band-aid — say “ adios, Stephen!
然后恢复单身
” and hello, Bumble!
你知道吗我……【清嗓子】
You know I… [clears throat]
喔 喔 喔!
-Ooh, ooh, ooh!
我知道你们的纪念日快到了
I know youranniversary’s coming up.
我给你们俩准备了礼物
I got the two of you a gift.
是什么?是什么?是什么……
-What is it? What is it, what isit…
“凯蒂和史蒂芬 永远在一起!”
-“Katie and Stephen. Forever andalways!”
你该不会……!
-You did not…!
【内心独白】:呃 狗屎!
– [internal dialogue]: Aww,SH*T!
我认为最好的方法是做个“火鸡落跑计划”
– I think ideally you do a “ turkey dump. ”
你懂的 在感恩节分手
You know, a Thanksgiving cut-and-run.
所以“火鸡跑”的新释义
-So the new definition of a “ turkey trot ”
实际上……并不是让你在感恩节跑步
is actually… it’s not the run you do on Thanksgiving.
而是让你逃离不良的恋爱关系
-You run away from your badrelationship.

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视频概述

大家都觉得在假期里分手是很残忍的一件事,所以大家即使很不情愿也大都不会选择在假日分手

听录译者

收集自网络

翻译译者

加泰罗尼亚的小铁匠

审核员

审核员 RN

视频来源

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YBvaD3VC7nM

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