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同理心是最具价值的技能

Why Empathy is the Most Valuable Skill

此处为广告时间
Imagine that we’re walking through
我们可以想象一下
a sandy village bazaar
我们正穿过一个沙地村的集市
and we notice a crowd
这时我们看到一群人
gathering around one of the shops.
围在其中一个店铺前
A masked merchant thrusts an item into the air,
一个戴面具的商人将一件物品举向空中
and everyone starts making offers:
然后所有的人都开始出价
a life of service, non-vital limbs,
终身的服务 不重要的四肢
acres of land, and thousands of jewels.
数英亩的土地 成千上万的珠宝
What could be worth all this time, energy, and wealth?
是什么物品 值这些时间 精力和财富呢?
A golden lamp.
是一个金灯
A being of unimaginable knowledge and power
一个拥有无穷智慧和力量的存在
lives inside that lamp: a genie.
一个精灵住在那个灯里
He can be freed by rubbing the lamp,
有人摩擦神灯 他就能获得自由
and in exchange for his freedom,
作为获得自由的交换条件
he’s willing to grant three wishes.
精灵愿意实现他的三个愿望
Wishes sit at the peak of valuable gifts.
愿望是最有价值的礼物
We can use them to become wealthy,
我们可以通过愿望变得富有
beautiful, successful, and even generous.
美丽 成功 甚至慷慨
They empower us to become who we want to be.
愿望使我们变成我们想成为的人
Our minds create a map
我们的大脑造了一张地图
that leads us from who we are to who we want to be,
引导我们从现在的自己走向未来的自己
but genies allow us to travel to the destination in an instant.
但是精灵可以让我们立马到达目的地
Although we may not be able to do it as fast as a genie,
虽然我们不能像精灵一样快地达到目标
we can learn to grant wishes.
但我们可以学着去实现愿望
And we have to start by developing our empathy.
我们得从培养我们的同理心开始
The root of empathy is *pathos*,
同理心的起源于“悲悯”
a word from Ancient Greece.
这个词来自古希腊
It has multiple definitions that can’t be separated:
它有许多不可分割的定义
experience, suffering, emotion and destiny.
经历 苦难 情感和命运
Our experience of suffering is intertwined with our destiny.
苦难的经历与我们的命运交织在一起
Growth lies in overcoming our pain.
在克服痛苦的过程中我们收获成长
Sitting on the couch all day
整天坐在沙发上
produces bodily pains, hunger, and boredom.
造成了身体上的不适 饥饿感和无聊感
Hunger causes us to eat,
当我们饿了 我们去吃东西
which causes us to grow stronger.
这使我们更强壮
Boredom causes us to read,
当我们无聊时 我们阅读
which causes us to grow smarter.
这使我们更聪明
Pathos is the unavoidable pain intertwined with our growth.
苦难是我们的成长中不可避免的
Empathy is the ability
同理心是一种能力
to understand our pathos
它让我们了解我们的痛苦
and map out who we are, who we want to become,
在地图上看到现在的自己 未来的自己
and the obstacles standing in our way.
以及路上的障碍
After identifying the obstacles in our way,
在了解了我们路上的障碍之后
we can start gaining the knowledge and power
我们可以获得我们需要的
we need to overcome them.
智慧和力量去战胜它们
We gain knowledge and power
我们从反复的试错 练习和尝试中
through trial and error, practice, and experimentation.
获得智慧和力量
By overcoming obstacles,
当越过障碍后
we become competent.
我们变得有能力
With empathy and competence,
有了同理心和能力
we learn to negotiate with ourselves.
我们学会与自己和解
We know how to exchange our time and energy
我们知道如何用我们的时间和力量
to reach our goals.
去达成我们的目标
Being able to negotiate with ourselves
学会与自己和解
leads to a good internal relationship.
让我们内心和谐
But no one is competent enough to do everything on their own.
但没有一个人有能力自己完成所有的事情
We depend on good external relationships to fulfill our wishes.
我们依赖好的外部关系实现我们的愿望
And luckily we can use empathy and competence
幸运的是 我们可以用同理心和能力
to negotiate with others.
与他人协商
Nina is a wealthy entrepreneur
Nina是一个富有的企业家
with no time to cook,
但她没时间做饭
and Nick is a phenomenal chef
Nick是一个非凡的厨师
with no job.
但他没有工作
She would like to get fit and eat healthy,
她想保持健康 也想吃得健康
and he would like to make a steady income.
而他想要一份稳定的收入
By empathizing with each other’s pain
互相理解彼此的痛点
and exchanging competencies,
并且交换能力之后
Nick and Nina can negotiate
Nick和Nina可以协商达成
a successful business arrangement.
一个成功的商业协议
They can fulfill each other’s wishes.
他们可以满足彼此的愿望
On a mountain of valuable gifts,
在一座有很多宝贵礼物的山上
wishes sit at the peak.
愿望是最有价值的
They empower us to become who we want to be.
它们使我们变成我们想成为的人
But the ability to grant wishes
而实现愿望的能力
is made up of three skills
是由三个技能组成的
that we find in the genie–
这些是我们从精灵那里学到的
the greatest granter of wishes.
他是最伟大的愿望实现者
After freeing the genie from his lamp,
精灵从灯里面出来后
he asks us what we would like.
他问我们想要什么
He demonstrates empathy.
他向我们展示了同理心
“Genie, we’d like the ability to fly,” we say.
“精灵 我们想要飞翔的能力” 我们说
“I can do that,” he replies.
“没问题” 他回答
He snaps his fingers and gives us wings.
他打了一个响指 然后给我们一双翅膀
The genie demonstrates his competence and ability to negotiate.
精灵向我们展示了协商的能力
He knows what we want,
他知道我们想要什么
has the capacity to make it happen,
而且他有能力实现
and will make it happen.
最终也的确使它成真
By mastering negotiation, competence, and empathy,
掌握了协商 能力 同理心这三个技能
we can learn to grant any wish.
我们就可以学着去实现任何的愿望
Together, all three skills combine to form a pyramid:
这三个技能组合到一起形成了一个金字塔
empathy at the base, competence in the middle,
金字塔从下到上依次是
and negotiation at the top.
同理心 能力和协商
And since the others depend on it,
因为另外两个以它为基础
empathy is the most valuable skill.
所以同理心是最具价值的技能
Without empathy, even a genie can’t make us happy.
没有同理心 精灵也不能让我们开心起来
Without knowing our desired location,
不知道我们想要的目的地
there’s nowhere we can go that would satisfy us.
我们去哪儿也不会高兴
And yet, even if we knew our destination
然而 即使我们知道自己的目的地
and could be transported there,
也有可能顺利到达
I can’t help but believe that we would just set a new destination.
但我仍相信我们能开辟一条新的道路
Perhaps, the process of walking the path
或许 在路上跋涉的过程
is just as important as understanding and creating it.
跟理解和创造这条道路一样重要
Like baking soda mixing with vinegar, the kissing of two tectonic plates,
像小苏打遇见醋 像两个板块互相吻合
or the collision of two heavenly bodies,
也像两个天体相撞
me and you, we just might be the process that arises under the right universal conditions.
我和你 或许只是在合适的时空相会
Maybe, we’re like raindrops leaving the clouds and heading towards the ocean—
也许 我们像离开云层流向大海的雨滴
a process between two end states.
从一个尽头到另一个尽头
And yet, all of the beauty, joy, and freedom lies in the act of falling.
然而 所有的美丽 快乐和自由都在下落的过程中
此处为广告时间

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视频概述

在人生的漫长道路上,我们经历苦难,常常感到痛苦,而这也让我们能更深地理解别人正在经历的,同理心让我们与自己和解,与他人更亲近。

听录译者

收集自网络

翻译译者

Janice

审核员

审核员LJ

视频来源

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=khggL5Uqae8

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