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为什么千禧世代很难约会

Why Dating Is Hard for Millennials

It would be hard to find a group of people
在当代社会里 很难找到一群人
more insulated from in-person interactions than Millennials today
比千禧世代更缺少人与人之间的互动了
Seamless delivers dinner
随处可见的外卖服务
Tinder makes matches
线上匹配好友的Tinder
Headphones discouraged chatting
阻碍交流的耳机
We also grew up with things like caller ID and automated customer service
来电显示和自动客服之类的东西伴随着我们成长
that took the stranger interacting out of a lot of everyday errands
这减少了陌生人之间处理日常事务时互动的机会
Less interacting with strangers in public
在公共场合与陌生人交流的机会减少
means less flirting with strangers in public
意味着与陌生人在公共场合搭讪的机会变少
How did young people become so stranger-averse
年轻人是怎样变得如此厌恶陌生人的
and what does that mean for dating?
而这对约会来说又意味着什么呢?
This is Ashley
这是Ashley
She reports on trends and relationships of families
她主要研究家庭状况的变化趋势和关系
so she’s interviewed a lot of people about their experiences dating
因此她询问了很多人约会的经历
People who are pretty young in their 30s in their 20s
这些人还很年轻 只有二三十岁
Some who were in college
有些人还在读大学
Technology has made the act of meeting people offline almost obsolete
科技进步已经使得线下见面几乎过时了
With Tinder’s estimated global user base at nearly 50 million
根据Tinder对他们全球接近5000万用户的调查
many people rely on apps as the primary way to date
许多人把线上应用作为首要的约会形式
Today’s dating pool I think has a different skill set
现在约会需要和以往不同的技能
being good at flirting in a way that translates to a text message
过去所需要的搭讪技能到今天转变成了擅长发信息
We can manage a lot through asynchronous communication
通过非同步通信 我们可以更好地处理一些信息
I can look at a text from you, and I can really think about how I want to respond
我看到了你的短信之后可以好好想一想该如何回复
I might pass my phone around to my friend group
我可能会把我的手机传递给我的朋友们
and how them weigh and how they think I should respond
询问他们的看法以及他们认为我应该如何回复
And there’s a reason you never want to put your phone down
还有一个让你从来不想放下手机的原因
The apps are designed to be addictive
那就是这些应用被设计成容易上瘾的模式
which makes it even harder to stop swiping once you’re hooked
所以你一旦沉迷 放下手机就变得更难了
One thing that the founders of Tinder said about founding it
Tinder的创始人曾说过一件创立时的事
was they wanted it to feel like a game
他们想让用户感觉像在玩游戏
They designed the app itself to feel like a deck of cards
所以他们把这款应用设计成了扑克牌的形式
when you were flipping over one and then
当你翻到一张牌时
you kind of weigh in on it, approve of it, or discard it,
你会权衡是要收下还是丢掉
then you can move on to the next one and they wanted it to feel like something
然后你就可以继续翻开下一张 他们想要让你觉得
you could just do forever kind of for fun to entertain yourself
这件令人放松的事可以永远做下去
When more and more people are finding dates
当越来越多的人可以在舒适的沙发上
from the comfort of their couch,
用手机寻找约会对象时
the experience of dating becomes siloed from the rest of social life
找对象的过程就会与其他社交生活分隔开
I’ve heard people say sometimes they will have a good interaction
我曾听人说过 当他们遇到相处得不错的人
or like kind of catch the eye of someone who’s cute
或是被一个可爱的人吸引了注意
and then not say anything just hope that they find them
他们什么也不会说
on the apps later when they’re swiping,
只希望之后可以在社交软件上左滑右滑的时候找到他们
whereas like I think in prior generations people had much more of half an eye turned out toward
而前几代的人们会将日常生活中超过一半的精力
finding potential mates, potential partners, potential dates, just kind of during everyday life.
投入在寻找潜在的伴侣 同伴和约会对象上
It’s hard to make a date offline when no one wants to talk to strangers
当没有人愿意和陌生人说话时 线下找人约会就变得很难
An entire generation of kids was once taught to fear them
整整一代的孩子曾被教导要害怕陌生人
Starting when we were little,
从我们小时候开始
we had the stranger-danger philosophy among parents
父母就传递了一种“陌生人很危险”的观念
that really kept us away from people we didn’t know
这让我们远离不认识的人
because they might be out to harm us
因为担心他们会伤害我们
Things that are very valid when you’re a small child
当你还是个小孩子时这个理念非常有意义
but when you’re an adult maybe those aren’t, aren’t as appropriate
但它对于成人后的你可能就不那么合适了
You told your children to be polite and friendly
你教导你的孩子要有礼貌 要友善
but how do you taught them when not to be
但是你该怎样教导他们不需要这么做
Hi dear, do you live around here
小朋友你好 你住在这附近吗?
Stranger danger PSAs were popular in the 80s and 90s
在千禧一代成长的过程中 80年代和90年代所流行的
when Millennials were growing up
宣传陌生人危险的公益广告影响很大
The campaign’s were developed in response to infamous child abductions at the time
该活动是针对当时臭名昭著的诱拐儿童事件而开展的
Even today their impact lingers
即使到了今天 他们的影响依然存在
When I’ve talked to young people about what happens
我曾和年轻人们谈论
when they get approached by people who want to flirt with them in a public space
当他们在公共场合被人搭讪时会发生什么
is that they just sort of don’t know what to do with that interaction
他们会不知道该如何处理这种互动
Ultimately perhaps it’s our priorities that have shifted
根本上说 这也许是因为我们的优先考虑事项发生了变化
making the search for a mate less important
寻找伴侣的重要性降低了
More people are delaying marriage
更多的人推迟结婚
Meeting someone in any capacity is not necessarily the goal
竭尽所能找到心仪的人不再是必要的目标
There’s a fear of falling in love that young people come by honestly
坠入爱河的年轻人们实际上都会有一种顾虑
because they often have been given a message from the time they were this big
因为他们在小时候经常被灌输这样一个理念
it’s education first, it’s performance first,
学业第一 事业第一
it’s achievement first, it’s ambition first
成就第一 抱负第一
I have to have all these sorts of boxes checked off
在考虑让另一个人走进我的生活之前
before I can even imagine bringing another person into my life
我必须把以上待办事项完成才行
So what is all this meant for love and partnership?
那这一切对于爱情和伴侣关系意味着什么呢?
For one, traditional social networks are broadening
首先 传统意义上的社交网络正在扩大
We are much more likely to date across a significant cultural difference
我们比过去拥有更多机会
than we were in years past,
和有明显文化差异的对象约会
and so one in six new marriages bridges a significant
六分之一的新人跨越社会人口方面的各类差异
socio-demographic difference like race like ethnicity like faith
比如人种差异 民族差异和信仰差异而结合
But while some things have changed
虽然有些事情已经改变了
others remain the same
但有的事情仍然是一样的
People forget it was always hard to meet someone
人们忘记了遇见一个心仪的人总是很困难的
Now, there is just a different problem
现在 它只是转变成了另外一个方面的问题
People are still looking for the same thing
人们仍然在寻找相同的东西
if the milestones are the same,
见证爱情的里程碑是一样的
the big questions are the same
遇到的大问题也是一样的
How people find each other is the thing that has changed
但是人们如何找到彼此的方式改变了
Thanks for watching the Idea File
感谢收看《思想档案》
and if you like what you see you can follow us on our YouTube channel
如果你喜欢这个节目 可以关注我们的YouTube频道

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视频概述

随着时代的改变,网络发展,千禧一代所受的教育也随时代背景改变,他们更难实现现实生活中的约会。

听录译者

收集自网络

翻译译者

KZ

审核员

审核员BY

视频来源

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h3V9wnwX-rM

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