Here are true facts about the Owl.
Baby Owls are called Owlets
and they look like a cotton ball
that grew a face, and legs.
Owlets are born without flight feathers.
And because they are vulnerable,
they camouflage themselves as Muppets.
The Owl has large front facing eyes
which give it a wide range of binocular vision.
Its eyes are nearly immobile in their sockets
So therefore it must swivel its head around its neck to see.
Some owls bob their heads up and down
in order to maximize their depth perception.
Try it right now.
Focus on object and bob your head up and down.
That’s right! Keep bobbing your head.
It doesn’t really work for humans,
but you do look like an idiot.
As the Owl grows older,
it developes its flying feathers.
Oh my that’s cute!
He’s like a little baby.
He likes being pet.
看那大眼睛 不是吗 太可爱了
It’s really the eyes, isn’t it? It’s adorable.
Oh look this one playing with his friend.
Wait, what are you doing to that Bird?
Crap you’re not playing with it.
Don’t try to hide it. I already saw it.
Despite its cuddly appearance beneath those fluffy feathers,
the owl is what we call a bird of prey,
because it eats prey.
As the owls call us Apes of the hamburger
because we eat hamburgers.
The Owl is a specialized hunting machine.
Its talons on are Zygo dactyl, two in front two in back,
and their grip is the strongest of the raptors.
500 pounds per square inch
eight times stronger than the human.
Just for the record.
This is why we wear a glove.
They crush their victims. Then tear it off little strips
before swallowing them whole, digesting them
and then vomiting out the bones and fur in a small pellet.
And this is why it’s polite to
throw up at an owl dinner party.
The Owl is a quiet hunter.
it has specialized feathers on the front of its wings
that reduce turbulence and allow it to fly in relative silence.
If silence were loudless,
they would be the loudest flying bird.
That’s…that’s a terrible metaphor.
The Owl’s face is basically like a giant ear.
The specialized feathers of its facial disk
channel sound to its ear holes,
like a fuzzy satellite dish.
呕 有点恶心 这是耳孔
Oh, that’s nasty, yep that’s an earhole.
Many owls have asymmetrical ear holes,
one is higher than the other.
By sensing tiny differences in the delay
in volume of sound as it arrives in each ear,
the Owl is able to create a three-dimensional
auditory map of its surroundings.
Try riding a bicycle at night and
picking up a moving burrito with your feet,
based on the sound that it makes.
That is how an Owl do.
When they aren’t being quiet,
Owls make a wide variety of sounds.
Perhaps the most famous of these sounds
is the hoo-hoo sound made by some owls.
It reminds me of the fairy tale
where a young girl is lost in the forest.
And she sees an Owl and asked it,
“Do you know where my mother is?”
And the Owl responds,
“Why the hell would I know where your mother is?
Are you stupid?
And why are you fairy tale children
always getting lost in forests
and hallucinating about animals that can talk?”
And then the owl swooped down,
and rippled the little girl’s face off and ate her eyeballs.
and then the owl hooted ‘hoo hoo’.
It’s a German fairy tale.
so…its a little dark I guess.
Maybe it’s the translation?
Nope, not the translation,
says right here rips her face off.
Oh god, there’s even a picture.
Just remember don’t do drugs
Because an Owl may just to rip your face off.
Here we go as a silly beak.
Come on, silly beak for his that silly beak.
Here we go.
I’m gonna get your silly beak, hmm?
Get that silly big gear here.
Good boy! Now he’s gonna get me.