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Tame Your Mind, Open Your Heart, and Reclaim Life’s Most Difficult Moments

我被问到过这样一个问题 天哪 我还没考虑好 我该怎样开始呢
I get asked this question of …geesI haven’t meditated. How do I get started?
这个问题对很多人来说都是难以理解的 因为我们当中有很多人无法体会
And it’s hard for many people because what many of us don’t appreciate is that – and I use
为什么我要使用书中的术语 比如说DJ 但实际上是 这是一个面向内心的对话
the term in my book, a DJ, but it’s this internal dialogue and it is a dialogue that
在这个对话中 你是谁并不重要 重要的是
isn’t necessarily who you really are at all. It is a collection of events, experiences,
你生活中发生的事 你的经历和你获得的评价所有这些将决定你如何定义自己 而很有可能
commentaries from your environment that oftentimes you allow to define you. And not necessarily
不是积极的那种 因此 你可能会有比较情绪化的反应 每当你听到
in a positive way. And as a result you have an emotional response when you’re listening
这些声音 或这些对话 或DJ的时候 所以我给你们的第一个建议
to these voices or this dialogue or the DJ if you will. And the first thing that I recommend
people do and certainly as one of the bases or the legs of doing mindfulness or meditation
就是简单的呼吸方法 调整好自己的呼吸节奏 当你的注意力被分散
is to simply breathe in and out and be attuned to that. And as you get distracted if it’s
尤其是你的注意力实在难以集中的时候 你就专注于从鼻子吸进的空气
really distracting actually consciously think about the air going through your nose and
从嘴里呼出的空气 你的注意力就自然而然地
exhaling through your mouth. And the very nature of that type of concentration distracts
从其他的对话中被转移了过来 一旦你能成功地做到了这些
you from the dialogue. And once you’ve mastered that and you pay attention to the fact that
你就经常感到自己的肌肉变得很紧实 因为你再次开始情绪激动了
oftentimes your muscles are very tense because again you’re carrying your emotions. And
你就有意地对自己说 我在放松脚部肌肉
with intention go through actually and say I’m relaxing the muscles in my feet, my
还有腿部 还有胸部 还有腹部等等 都要放松下来
legs, my chest, my abdomen and so forth.
刻意地稍稍进行这个过程 你专注于其中的每一个步骤
And sort of go through this process with intention doing each one of these things and with intention
also distractions you from listening to that voice. And once you’ve done that for a period
你就会幡然醒悟 那是个多么自然的行为 行云流水 一气呵成
of time then you suddenly realize the very nature of that action, the consistency of
你不再有那种情绪化地回应 并且 你也不再听见
that, you’re no longer having that same emotional response or you’re not starting
那段对话 这就让你释怀了 然后下一步
to listen to that dialogue. And that starts releasing you. And then the next step as you
要学的还有很多技巧 最美妙的是你真的可以改变对话了
learn these techniques, the wonderful thing is you can actually changed the dialogue.
把它转换为一段积极地谈话 其中最大的挑战就是
And change it to one where it is a supportive dialogue. One of the greatest challenges of
西方人由于社会的自然影响 自己就会产生消极的谈话方式
people in the West is they have this negative internal dialogue and it’s the nature unfortunately
东方文化其实有趣的是 这并不是真正地存在
of our society. In Eastern cultures actually it’s interesting. It doesn’t really exist.
所以 当你 如果你停止DJ 然后 把对话方式培养成
And so when you if you will stop the DJ and then change the dialogue to one that is nurturing,
你自己的有正能量的一种方式 最奇妙的就是那样会改变你的生理机能
supportive of yourself the most wonderful thing that happens is your physiology changes
接着 你的反应方式或者你与他人的交流方式 也会完全不同
and then the manner in which you react or interact with other people becomes completely
以往了 我自己经历过这些 我看到过这些 我也在传授这些知识 这都让我感受到
different. And having been through this myself and seen this and taught this it’s really
这种方法有非同寻常的可能性 因为当你花了一点时间来深呼吸
quite extraordinary the possibilities. Because when you take the time to do that breathing,
当你甘愿花时间去驯服你的注意力 当你愿意敞开心扉
when you take the time if you will to tame the mind, when you take the time to open your
你就能意识到 不是只有你一个在承受实际上每个人都多多少少
heart and recognize that not only are you suffering but that everyone in some way or
有些负担 所有的步骤都会让你更会思考
other has burdens. All of those steps then allow you to be much more thoughtful, kind
更善良 更有趣 因为你已经意识到 所有的人都跟你一样
and interested because then you recognize that the other person is just like you.And
你会发现最关键的一点是 予人玫瑰 手留余香
when you recognize that key aspect then what you do to others you’re doing to yourself.
如果对自己仁慈行善 心怀怜悯 充满关爱 那你也更容易对他人
And if you treat yourself with kindness, compassion, love it’s so much easier then to give that
已所不欲 勿施于人 这不仅仅会影响他人 它还能改变整个社会环境
gift to other people. And it changes not only that other person, it changes the entire environment
around you.