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Meet Ryan, committing to a life of love | My Last Days

自从杰丝15岁 我16岁
And Jess and I have been together since
我们开始约会或成为好朋友时 就在一起了
We’ve been dating or best friends since she was 15 and I was 16.
所以 我们差不多半辈子都在一起
So literally half our life.
我记得他就像 我初恋的那个男生
I remember he was, like, the first boy I ever had a crush on.
我知道 我想 “我将会嫁给那个家伙”
I knew, I was like, “I’m gonna marry that guy.”
而他那时并不喜欢我 因为我就是个小妹妹
And he didn’t like me because I was the younger sister.
He finally saw the light.
实际上 我是唯一他与之约会的人
I’m actually the only person he’s ever dated.
Ryan和Jessica 你们是天作之合
Ryan and Jessica, you are the real deal.
You are the true love story.
对于爱情应该是什么样子 你们给予了启发
You’re an inspiration for what love should be.
Thank you for showing that
to all in our community and to me and my best friend.
My name is Ryan Woods.
I have a glioblastoma tumor in my spine.
医生说 我还能活一至四个月
The doctors say I have one to four months to live.
I think it might be longer.
[my last days]
我知道我们总是提到我们的癌症 但是……
I know we always refer to it as our cancer, but…
我们的医生 我们的癌症
Our doctors, our cancer.
我们的医生 我们的这个 我们的那个 没错
-Our doctors, our this, our that, yeah.
-It’s — We’re in this together.
We have very few memories or experiences that aren’t shared.
所以 她生活中的任一部分没有我的存在
So the idea of her doing any part of life without me,
你知道 或是我的生活中没有她 是——
you know, or me without her, is —
我是说 这种想法简直难以想象
I mean, is literally unimaginable,
because we’ve always done life together.
It’s weird.
艾米 简 你们会帮我搅拌一下吗
Amy Jane, you gonna help me mix?
You want to come in and help me make breakfast?
[ Indistinct talking ]
停! [狗吠]
-Stop! [ Dog barks ]
好了 我们去学校喽
All right, to school we go.
这是 这是荒谬的打击 [呵呵]
This was, this is ridiculously shocking. [ Chuckles ]
We have no cancer history whatsoever in my family.
不管怎样 我患的癌症 极其罕见
The type of cancer I have is incredibly rare, anyways.
你知道 我还年轻并且健康
You know, I’m young, healthy.
我经常骑自行车 我们到处走
I bike ride a lot. We walk everywhere.
直到我得了癌症 瘦得皮包骨
Up until I got cancer, I was skinny and scrawny.
你知道 我意思是 健康地方式[大笑]
You know, I mean, in a healthy way. [ Laughs ]
就像 我们会做所有你做的事情
It’s like, we do everything you’re supposed to do
为了健康 不生病 不得癌症
to be healthy and to not be sick and to not have cancer.
-So, he had surgery exactly a year ago today.
When he came out of surgery,
he was paralyzed from the waist down.
而且在十二月 他病得真的很重
And in December, he got really sick.
就像 那时我就像:
Like, that was when I was like,
“噢 我想我丈夫快死了”一样
“Oh, I think my husband’s dying.”
It was just this huge awakening of,
“I think you need to start working —
经受—— 经受住这个现实
holding this — holding this reality.
可能不会发生—— 但至少会欣然前往
It might not happen — but at least being willing to go there.
-I would much rather be the person dying
也不愿是那些 活着却被遗忘的人
than the people who are living, who are left behind.
我想 我已经能从容面对了
I think I have it easy.
我并非—— 并非害怕死亡
I’m not — I’m not scared of dying whatsoever.
人们提醒我 我也提醒别人
I get to be reminded and remind other people
死亡……死亡没什么大不了 你知道吗
that — that death isn’t — death is not anything, you know?
Death is just another part of our story,
并且是……是恐怖的部分 我意思是 死亡很恐怖
and it’s a — it’s a terrible — I mean, death is terrible.
但是 我们不应该害怕 你知道吗
But it’s not something to be feared, you know?
确实 即使我们的生活很艰难
-Really, even though our story’s hard
and our story has lots of pieces that are messy and tragic — just really tragic —
I think there’s just so many things that are beautiful
and there are so many things that are life-giving
and not just about death.
And the way people have interacted with us
and the way that people have loved us
我们经历这些的方式 你知道……
and the way that we’ve grown through this, you know…
因此 今晚 他们为我准备了烤肉和烤面包
-So, tonight, they’re gonna have a roast and toast of me.
那么他们要做的就是 所有人齐聚一堂
So what they’re gonna do is, everyone’s gonna come together,
我们所有的朋友 家人和同事
all our friends and family and stuff,
and they’re gonna tell stories
他们会讲 对烤肉来说很有趣的故事
and they’re gonna tell stories that are funny for the roast
也会讲 对烤面包来说严肃而美好的故事
and they’re gonna tell stories that are serious and nice for the toast.
对你 我们没有多少要讲的
-We don’t have too much to tell you.
我不知道如何做一个爸爸 当我用假嗓子说话时
I don’t know how to be a dad when I’m talking in a falsetto voice.
-I will be positive to a fault.
而且 事实上 对于缺陷 我真的相信它
And, actually, the thing is, I actually really believe it.
不是装出来的乐观 但我会——
Not artificially positive, but I will be —
I see the world through rose-colored glasses.
-Ryan would occasionally come over and say, “Hey.”
你知道 我们的关系也就如此 你知道吗
You know, that was the extent of our relationship, you know?
但是他有点儿像细菌 [笑声]
But he’s kind of like a fungus. [ Laughter ]
你知道 他有几分像长在你身上的那种
You know, he kind of grows on you.
而且 你知道 是好的那种 你知道吗
And, you know, in kind of a good way, you know?
可能像一只寄生虫 可能那是个更好的词
Maybe like a parasite. Maybe that’s a better term.
有几分像 像肿瘤生长或其他什么
-It’s kind of like a — like a tumor growth or something.
[笑声] 你可以那样表达
[ Laughter ] -You could phrase it that way.
-One thing that my daughter constantly reminds me of,
anytime that she starts to be sad
或因为我即将离开而难过时 她总是提醒说——
or I’m sad about leaving her, she always reminds —
她会说 “没事 但是 爸爸
She’s like, “Well, but, Daddy,
we’re only gonna be separate for a little while.”
她说 “嗯嗯 好吧 可能会是很长时间
She said, “Well, okay, maybe it’ll be a long time
’cause I’ve got a long life to live.”
她还会说 “我需要学习怎么开车
She’s like, “I need to learn how to drive,
我需要 我需要嫁人”之类的话
I need to — I need to get married.”
所以 我认为我们已经决定了
-So I think what we’ve decided,
he’s doing birthday cards for several years.
这样 他们在每次生日时会收到一张生日卡片
-So they’ll get a birthday card at every birthday.
并且 之后 像他们16岁时的礼物
-And, then, like a present when they’re 16.
And then he’s just having a binder
that he’s putting stories and memories of them.
如 “我出生的时候是什么样子的”
Like, “What was it like when I was born?”
Things about him as a child.
Just lots of memories and stories,
and we’re just gonna have a binder for each of them.
-Just gonna give it to them.
而且他们随时可以看到 你懂吗
And they can access it as they want, you know?
因此 当他们想念爸爸时
So they’re in control of how much they want to remember Dad
就能控制住自己的思念 你知道吗
and when they want to remember Dad, you know?
I don’t have many memories of when I was 4 years old.
所以 想想我4岁的女儿
And so to think of my 4-year-old daughter
and what she will or won’t remember of me
is a scary thought —
to think that I, in a lot of ways,
will be a shadow in her memory.
使他们明白(这点)对你们来说有多难 哈?
‘Cause they know how hard this is for you guys, huh?
你爸爸病了 你爸爸死了
To have your daddy be sick and to have your daddy dying.
They know how hard it is,
因此 他们想为孩子们办一场特别的聚会
and so they want to do a special party just for the kids.
-我希望在暑假举行 -会的
-I hope it’s in summer vacation. -It will be.
I would just invite anyone who watches this video
面对 我们都将死亡 这样一个现实
to live into this reality that we’re all dying.
这是陈词滥调 但是如果你是那个人——
It’s a clichéd statement, but if you’re the one —
实际上我快死了 所以我可以说那些话
I’m actually dying, so I can say that.
我可以说些陈词滥调 对吧
I can say cliché statements, right?
We’re all in the process of dying.
那么 问题来了
So the question is,
面对死亡 我们将活出怎样的生活呢
what kind of story are we gonna live out as we’re dying?
And we just invite people to live out a beautiful story,
实现他们的生活 创造美妙的音乐
to live out their life, make beautiful music,
无论是哪种缺憾 他们都将不得不面对
regardless of what kind of brokenness they have to deal with.
在我们走向死亡的旅途中 缺憾是不可避免的
And on our journey toward death, which is inevitable,
我们有机会 讲述一个美丽的故事
we have an opportunity to — to let a beautiful story be told.
并且我认为 让故事变成美好的事情
And I think it’s up to us
to allow that story to become something beautiful.
而且我希望我真的会感到尴尬 你知道
And I hope that I get really embarrassed, you know,
if I don’t die in one to four months,
你们知道 你们这些人做的所有一切都是因为我快死了
and, you know, you guys did all these things because I’m dying.
而且 你知道 接着我没有死 那太棒了
And, you know, and then I don’t die. That’d be awesome.
I would love to feel awkward because of that.
再见 爸爸
-Bye, Dad!
我很快就来看你 [大笑]
-I’ll see you in a second. [ Laughs ]
嘿 所有在SoulPancake的人
-Hey. So, the people over at SoulPancake
邀请我来 并让你以我的名义做些事情
have invited me to ask you to do something in my name.
那么 请求如下
So here’s the request.
我想邀请你在生活 工作 娱乐的地方
I want to invite you to cultivate a sense of love and community
where you live, where you work, and where you play.
对我们 这已经和在当地同一家商店反复购物一样简单
For us, it’s been as simple as shopping locally at the same stores over and over again.
就像 我们经常去同一家咖啡馆
It’s meant that we drink lots of coffee
as we go to the same café over and over again.
And it means that we have people over for meals often,
whether it’s a large community meal
or just one family coming over.
对于你们 由于想象力和环境的差异
For you, it’s gonna be something completely different
because of your own imagination and your own context.
所以 你介意发送一些
So, would you please mind sending in videos or pictures
关于你生活的视频 图片或故事吗
or stories of what it looks like in your context
把它们展现在 彼此相爱 互相关联的生活中
to commit to a life of love and connection where you live,
展现在你生活 工作和娱乐的地方?
where you work, and where you play?
看到一个活动的开始很令人兴奋 不是吗 谢谢
Be exciting to see a movement start, wouldn’t it? Thanks.