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与电锯杀人狂一起生活

Living With Jigsaw

那么 与电锯杀人狂一起生活是什么样的
So, what’s it like living with Jigsaw
并不像我想象的一样酷
Not as cool as I thought it would be.
我想玩个游戏
I want to play a game.
好吧 但我想洗个澡
Okay, well. I wanna take a shower.
所以……
So…
厕所被两层纸巾
The toilet has been clogged with two-ply paper-towels
和脏袜子所堵塞
and dirty socks.
在接下来的27秒 如果你不疏通它
If you do not fix it in the next twenty-seven seconds
它将会溢流
it will over-flow, covering your personal
以污秽的厕所水浸泡你的个人电子设备
electronic devices in filthy toilet water.
要到达厕所 你必须赤脚走在
To reach them, you must walk barefoot across a floor
覆盖有刀片的地板上
covered in razor-blades.
时钟嘀嗒作响 盖理 做出你的选择
The clock is ticking Gary, make your choice.
你们玻璃杯中的酒
The wine in both your glasses has been replaced
都已经换成了三趾树懒的血
with the blood of a three-toed sloth.
盖理
Gary.
盖理 盖-
Gary, Ga-
盖理
Gary
盖理 盖理
Gary, Gary
盖-盖理 盖理
Ga-, Gary, Gary
盖-
Gar-
盖理
Gary
什 什么 你想干什么
Wh- What? What d’you want?
我醒了 怎么了?
I’m awake. What?
你已经完全被老鼠夹所包围
You are completely surrounded by armed mouse traps.
(叹息)
*sighs*
你的车钥匙已经被强灌入bingo的身体
The keys to your car have been force-fed to Bingo.
在接下来的五分钟 你必须取回它们
You must retrieve them in the next five minutes
从开着的抽屉选择一个武器 使用它
using any weapon of your choosing from this open drawer,
或者你不能准时到达办公室
or you will not make it to the office on time.
这是你的选择 盖理
The choice is yours Gary.
你将会与你最好的朋友一起生活
Will you take the life of your best friend,
或者这周工作迟到四次
or be late to work for the fourth time this week.
做父母时你常遇到这种情况
You’ve had it with parenting,
但是稍等
but wait!
有一个解决方案
There is a solution.
介绍 小睡时间
Introducing, Nap Time!
最新最有效的工具
The latest, most effective tool
为预防儿童发脾气
for child tantrum prevention.
很简单
It’s simple!
用我们的专属睡觉配方润湿破布
Just douse a rag with our patented sleepy-time formula,
放在你的孩子哭泣的嘴上
place it over your child’s cry-hole,
轻轻按住8-12秒
press and hold gently for eight to twelve seconds,
赶快
and presto!
不再发脾气
No more tantrum.

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视频来源

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kTXfAtckS3g

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