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我们是怎样对自己撒谎的? – 译学馆
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我们是怎样对自己撒谎的?

How We Lie to Ourselves

一个对自我认知以及获得精彩生活的主要障碍
A major obstacle to self-knowledge, and in turn to a flourishing life
就是我们思想中的一部分会倾向于向其它部分撒谎
is the tendency of one part of our minds to lie to the other.
我们为了一个看似非常合理的理由说谎:
We lie for what might initially seem like a very understandable reason,
我们想避免痛苦
because we want to avoid pain.
但这样做了之后 我们会严重毁掉让我们幸福的机会
But in so doing, we hugely damage our chances of happiness.
以下是四种我们最喜欢欺骗自己的事情
There are four things we particularly like to lie to ourselves about.
我们在所有不确定的方面上撒谎
We lie about all the problematic aspects.
这会给我们的工作 人际关系
It would take so much effort to alter our jobs, our relationships,
友情 健康 习惯乃至想法带来极大的影响
our friendships, our health, our habits, and ideas.
我们撒谎是因为我们需要良好的自我感觉
We lie because we need to think well of ourselves,
需要努力想象自己是个本质正常的人
and devoted to imagining that we are essentially normal,
而非有着特殊的爱憎和异常的想法
without peculiar loves, hates, and deviant thoughts.
我们撒谎是因为我们不想感到匮乏
We lie because we don’t want to feel so inadequate.
也因为我们的确缺少很多美好的事物
And yet because we lack so many good things.
我们撒谎是因为对我们本应去爱的人发怒了
We lie because we’re furious with certain people we’re supposed to love.
我们撒谎还因为我们觉得自己所恼怒的事
And we lie because what we furious about
作为大人而言是很小气和可悲地琐碎的
feels so minor and pathetically petty for a grown-up to care about.
由于面对真相是如此残忍
Given how risky the truth about us can feel,
我们不得不学会成为一名谎言大师
we had to learn to be masters of deception.
我们撒谎的技术是广泛 可怕 并且充满想象力的
Our techniques are wide-ranging, devilish, and often hugely imaginative.
以下是一些我们用来擦亮自己双眼的好办法
Here are some of the leading maneuvers we employ to pull the wool over our own eyes.
分散注意力/上瘾
Distraction/Addiction
我们认同那些可以有效让我们的思想远离
We identify something that can powerfully keep our thoughts away
令人不安的内在冲突的东西
from troubling inner confrontations.
网络色情是最受欢迎的 其次是新闻
Online pornography’s a favorite. The news another.
第三是酒精 第四是工作
Alcohol, a third. Work, a fourth.
我们并不那么喜欢这些东西本身
We don’t so much like these elements in and of themselves.
我们喜欢他们是因为他们能让我们避开害怕的东西
We like them for their ability to keep us away from what we fear.
狂热的兴奋
Manic Cheeriness
一种不被我们承认的悲伤
A sadness we haven’t been able to admit to,
它通常会被夸大的狂热兴奋所覆盖的
is often covered up with exaggerated doses of manic cheeriness.
我们并不快乐 我们不能允许自己去感受
We aren’t happy, so much as incapable of allowing ourselves to feel
最轻微的伤感
even the slightest sadness.
以防我们会被埋藏着的悲伤所淹没
In case we were to be overwhelmed by our buried grief.
我们发展出一种易激的倾向 我们会说
We develop a brittle insistent tendency to say that,
“一切都很棒。”“这很棒 不是吗?”
“All is very well”, “This is lovely, isn’t it?”
我们也许太急于排除掉相反的想法了
We might press leaving no room for any ideas to the contrary.
易怒
Irritability
对一种特定的个人状况所压下的愤怒
Denied anger with a particular personal situation
通常会演化为普遍的易怒性
often seeps out into a generalized irritability.
谎言多成功啊 我们甚至不需要知道发生了什么
So successful is the lie, we don’t really know what’s up.
我们只是慢慢失去了脾气
We just keep losing our tempers.
有人动了电视遥控器冰箱里有两个鸡蛋
Someone moved the TV remote. There are two eggs in the fridge.
电子账单比我们预计的高了那么一点点
The electricity bill is slightly higher than we expected.
任何事都可以引爆我们
Anything can set us off.
我们的大脑充斥着事情是多么令人沮丧和烦恼的想法
Our brains are so filled with how frustrating, annoying things are.
我们聪明地不留空间给真正的悲伤的问题
We have cleverly left no space at all for focusing on the true and very sad issue.
诋毁
Denigration
我们告诉自己我们不在乎那些事
We tell ourselves that we simply don’t care about something.
爱或政治 事业的成功或理智的生活
Love or politics, career success or intellectual life.
那个漂亮的学生 或者我们买不起的房子
That beautiful student or the house we can’t afford.
而且我们还非常强调自己的不感兴趣和鄙视
And we are very emphatic about our lack of interest and complete disdain.
我们费了很大的力气去让别人和自己明白
We go to great lengths to make it very clear to others and ourselves
我们是多么地不关心
how absolutely unconcerned we are.
挑剔
Censoriousness
我们变得对一些人和行为非常地挑剔和不满
We grow censorious and deeply disapproving of certain kinds of behavior and people.
我们不敢承认的是 这么多的谴责
What we don’t admit is that was so full of condemnation,
只是因为我们不想让自己注意到
only because we need to ward off awareness
其实我们内心的一部分也喜欢被谴责的东西
that a part of us in fact really likes the condemned element.
我们攻击某些性癖好 把那当作是完全不正常以及越轨的
We attack certain sexual tastes as utterly deviant and beyond the pale,
恰恰因为我们知道自己
precisely because we have known that we share them,
内心深处也有同样的东西
somewhere inside ourselves.
所以看到新闻里某些人被逮捕或羞辱时 我们会感到高兴
So we’re delighted when particular people are arrested or shamed in the press.
我们坚定地认为他们的行为是非常糟糕的
What they did was utterly awful, we insist are outraged
以保护我们自己不会和他们联系到一块
shielding us from any risks spotting the connection between them and us.
防御性
Defensiveness
当遇到不舒服的事情时 我们可能会求助于一个很成功的注意力转移策略:
When there’s unwelcomed news, we may resort to a highly successful diversionary tactic,
生气
taking offense.
一个同事试着给我们一些建议
A colleague tries to give us a bit of feedback.
我们就立刻指责他们鲁莽 傲慢 并觉得我们是理所当然的
Instantly, we accuse them of rudeness, arrogance in a sense of entitlement.
一个拍档指出了某些问题
A partner points something out.
我们会感到愤怒 因为他们在一个困难的问题上给我们堆砌压力
We get furious that they’re piling pressure on us at a difficult point.
感到被冒犯占据了我们所有的注意力
Feeling offended takes up all our attention.
它混淆视听
It muddies the waters.
让我们不能把注意力放在
We no longer have to pay attention to information
那些正确却有挑战性的信息上
that is it heart correct but challenging.
愤世嫉俗 绝望
Cynicism, Despair
我们对某些特定的事情感到悲伤
We’re sad about particular things.
但面对它们是很艰难的 因此我们会泛化这种悲伤
But confronting them would be so arduous, we generalize and universalize the sadness.
我们不会说X或者Y让我们感到悲伤
We don’t say that X or Y has made us sad.
我们会说所有事都很可怕 所有人都很糟糕
We say that everything is rather terrible and everyone is rather awful.
我们传播痛苦
We spread the pain,
为了让那些特定的原因
in order that its particular specific causes
能不再吸引我们的注意力
can no longer be the focus of attention.
这样我们的悲伤可以 打个比方 消失在人海尽头
Our sadness gets, to put it metaphorically, lost in the crowd.
为什么对自己说谎是一个问题?
Why is lying to ourselves a problem?
如果可以 我们要告诉自己真相
We need to tell ourselves the truth when we can,
否则 我们总是要付出很大代价
for the simple reason that we often pay a very high price
来换取说谎后短时间的平静
for the short-term calm of our lies.
我们失去了成长和学习的关键机会
We miss key opportunities for growth and learning.
我们对周边的人并不友好
We’re not very nice to be around.
我们形成了伤害的系统
We develop harmful systems.
甚至还会排斥了真相
And not least, the truth will be out.
当我们不让真相出现时
When we don’t let it emerge,
它会倾向于通过身体的征兆自发地显现出来
it has a tendency to reveal itself through involuntary often physical symptoms.
我们变得失眠或者虚弱 我们的眼皮跳得不停
We become insomniac or impotent. An eyelid starts twitching.
我们会发生口吃 在睡梦中尖叫以及缺乏精力
We acquire a stutter, and scream in our sleep and lose energy.
我们会变得抑郁
We fall into depression.
为了我们自己 我们要勇敢开始面对真实的自己
We owe it to ourselves to dare to start to confront our real nature.

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视频概述

短片揭示了我们对自己说谎的表现和内在原因,以及所带来的后果。

听录译者

收集自网络

翻译译者

陈华仔

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视频来源

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=steu0fYGqhQ

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