– Hello everyone, and welcomeback to English with Lucy.
Today I am going to talk to you
about how you can stop being shy,
and start speaking English confidently.
My little brother andI were reading comments
on one of my videos the other day,
and he pointed out one which really made me feel sad.
Someone said,”I can’t speak English,
“because I am a shy person.”
And I don’t know if itwas the wording of it,
but it really broke our hearts.
The fact that somebody doesn’t think they can learn a language
because they are a shy person
made me feel really, really sad,
so I decided to make this
video to help motivate you all,
especially you shy people.
I receive a lot ofmessages about confidence,
人们说 哦 真希望我能像你一样自信
people saying oh, I wishI was confident like you,
but naturally, in certain situations,
I can feel so, so shy, and so, so nervous.
If you check out the last part
of most of my videos,
you can see all the times that I mix up my words,
and make mistakes.
It’s completely natural.
When I have to speak publicly, I often feel so, so shy.
But there are plenty of things that I do,
频道以来 做了很多事情 也学会了很多事情
and I have learned to doover the past few years,
since I started this channel, that have made me a confident person.
And I want to share that with you,
so let’s get started with the lesson.
The first one, this is a well-known tip,
but I really believe in it,fake it’til you make it.
And most importantly, don’ttell people that you feel shy.
Almost a year ago,
I was invited to speak about my business
at my old university.
I had to give a 45-minute talk,
all about me and my business,
to a room of so many students.
And my parents werewatching, and my boyfriend,
who is now my fiance.
I was so nervous, but I think I handled it really,
I didn’t tell anyonethat I was feeling shy.
It’s okay to be nervous,but don’t say you’re shy.
Saying you’re nervous isokay, but saying you feel shy,
I think is quite a negative thing to say,
and it might influence theway people think about you.
I pretended that I wasreally, really confident,
and that I do this kindof thing all the time.
When in reality, it wasmy first time speaking
about myself in front ofsuch a large audience.
I was scared of boring everyone,
I was scared that theperson organising the event
was going to regret asking me to speak,
I was scared of embarrassing myself in front of my boyfriend,
I was scared of disappointing my parents.
But I walked in there, head held high,
I slightly lowered my voice,
and I’m pretty convinced that no one knew
I was really, really nervous.
It was also being filmedand put on YouTube.
I will leave the linkin the description box.
So that was an extra layerof nervousness for me.
So what did I do?
I pretended I was super confident.
I tried to relax how I was standing,
I tried to relax my voice,
I went outside beforehand just to do some breathing, and to relax myself,
and it ended up going really, really well.
So how can this apply to you?
Not only are you nervousabout speaking to someone,
but it’s also not your native language.
You need to pretend that you’re confident.
You can try lowering your voice slightly.
So instead of speaking uphere, really nervously,
you will speak in a low voice,
and have it echo across the room. (laughs)
注意你的站姿 双脚分开 自然 挺拔
Work on your posture,feet apart, nice and tall,
shoulders relaxed, reallyshow the other speaker
that you’re comfortable being there.
And as I said before, don’ttell anyone you’re shy,
because sooner rather than later,
you will start to feel more confident,
you probably won’t even realise it,
and then you might regrethaving told someone
that you’re a shy person.
It doesn’t have to be that way.
You don’t have to be shy.
The next tip I have for you is listen,
and learn from other confident speakers.
When I try out a new hobby,
I often want to see how an expert does it.
If you really want to learnhow to be more confident,
and how to speak more confidently,
you need to listen to experienced and confident speakers.
Make it part of your daily routine.
Once you’ve found somebody and pinpointed
who you want to sound like,
try and imitate them a little bit.
Make it your own, but takeelements of their confidence
and elements of their speech.
For example, I really, really like
Stephen Fry的说话方式 所以
and admire the way Stephen Fry speaks. So,
I make a point to listento him speaking frequently.
A great way that youcan implement listening
to a confident speakerfor a little bit of time
every single day, is bylistening to audiobooks.
I recommend Audible.
You can click the link in the description box to get a free audiobook,
that’s a 30-day free trial.
I really, really recommendlistening to Stephen Fry
narrating the Harry Potter series,
or you could try listeningto books on public speaking,
or books on eliminatingand combating shyness.
I’ve got some recommendations in the description box as well.
Tip number three, this is something that I’ve spoken
about before, but I 100 % recommend it.
It is, rehearse and prepare
your best stories and monologues,
and things that you knowyou will have to say
time and time again.
Make a habit of talking to yourself
and practising your best stories,
and the answers to themost frequent questions.
Where are you from, what are your hobbies,
what’s your job, what would you like to do in the future?
Tell me about yourself,that’s such a big one.
And it makes me feel nervous when someone asks me
that in my own language, so I can only
imagine how hard it is for you,
especially if you’re shy.
Practise it, maybe evenwrite it down at first,
and then practise it untilyou know it off by heart.
You don’t want to know it word for word,
you just want to know that when somebody asks you that question,
you know what to say, and you can say it with confidence.
I also said, practiseyour favourite stories.
These are great ways tofill gaps in conversation.
I’ve got a few funny onesthat I’ve told in videos,
like my waitressing mistakes,
or the lovely story about my dad’s fairy book.
Links to those are alsoin the description box.
Those are stories that I liketo tell at dinner parties,
and people like beingaround good storytellers,
so it’s really, really important to learn how to tell a good story.
And treat each time youtell a story as practise.
Gauge their response.
Did they react well to what you said?
Did they find it boring?
Make the necessarily tweaks. Then,
after 20 timesof telling this story,
hopefully to different people each time,
try not to repeat yourself, (laughs)
you will tell it beautifully.
Right, my next tip ispractise asking questions.
Learning how to say questionscorrectly is so important,
but also quite difficult in English.
But it’s so important for shy people,
because it means that if youneed a break from speaking,
you can pass the batonto the other person. Examples,
so how did youget into your career path?
Or if you could do one thing differently,
what would you do
That opens up an opportunity
for the other person to tell their story, and to talk a bit,
so you can have time for a rest.
Most people enjoytalking about themselves,
and they also appreciate good listeners.
And you can be both ofthose by asking questions.
The only thing you have to do is
learn and remember how to ask them correctly.
I always have a couple ofquestions up my sleeve,
so that if I’m feeling nervous or shy,
I can quickly ask someone something,
and we can continue the conversation that way.
And there’s no pressure on me.
Number five is don’t takeyourself too seriously.
The best way to bondwith people is to laugh,
and especially to laugh at yourself.
If I feel shy about something,
sometimes I make a joke about it
I remember when I was learning Spanish,
I was so embarrassed about making mistakes,
but actually, those mistakes ended up
being my funniest stories in Spanish.
If you speak Spanish,
and you want to hear about my funny,
or at least I thinkthey’re funny, (laughs)
Spanish mistake stories,
and such (speaking in foreign language).
And I’ll leave the linkin the description box.
I laugh at myself, basically,
for a full 10 minutes. (laughs)
Embrace making mistakes.
They are such a powerful tool.
Not only do you learn from them,
but you can also create comedy from them.
But if you’re quite obviously uptight
and really embarrassedabout your mistakes,
it puts the otherperson, or your audience,
in a really awkward situation.
You don’t want people cringing for you,
you want people to feel comfortable that they can laugh along with you.
Keep a note of all these funnymistakes that you’ve made,
and then maybe one day, you can meet somebody else that’s shy,
when you’re already fluent in English,
and you can make them feel better and tell them about your ridiculous experiences.
第六 尽可能多地结交 并和
Number six, meet and talk to as many
different people as possible.
In your life, you are goingto meet so many people
that you will never, ever meet again.
So if you do embarrassyourself in front of them,
if the worst does happen,it doesn’t matter.
You might think about it again, they might
think about it again, but if you don’t
ever see them again, it doesn’t matter!
Take the opportunity tospeak with strangers,
to go out and meet people,
to talk to as many different people as possible.
Confidence for shy peoplecomes with practise.
An example, I never really made
my own friends before, as an adult.
I always just had friends from childhood,
or friends that I shared with my partner,
and when I moved tothis village, I was new,
my fiance was new, we didn’t know anyone,
but I really wanted to make friends.
But I felt really shy.
But we started goingout sometimes together,
sometimes apart, and makingreal efforts to talk to people.
If we recognised someone,we would say hello.
I would sometimes pop to the coffee shop
on my own and talk to the people there.
Or go to the pub and see the same people
经常见面 聊天 慢慢地了解他们
over and over again, and get to know them very, very slowly.
最初 我真的觉得很尴尬 也很害羞
At first, it felt reallyawkward, and I felt really shy.
But now we just really enjoy being able to go anywhere
in our village and know people.
Had we allowed ourselvesto be naturally shy,
as we are, that wouldn’t have happened.
It was by practising speaking to
as many different people as possible,
that we felt confident.
Right, that’s it for today’s lesson.
I hope you enjoyed it, and I really hope
you learned something, and I really hope that you’re
going to make more effort to feel less shy,
or at least seem less shy,
until you become less shy.
Don’t forget to check out Audible
you can get your free audiobook and 30-day free trial,
in the description box.
I’ve also got all of theother links I’ve mentioned,
and please do comment down below
with any other tips and recommendations
that have helped you become less shy.
And don’t forget to connect with me on all of my social media.
I’ve got my Facebook,I’ve got my Instagram,
and I’ve got my Twitter.
And I shall see yousoon for another lesson. Mwah! (lips smack)
(electronic beep) (lighthearted music)
Today I’m going to talk to you
about how, ow. (laughs)(electronic beep) Today,
I’m going to talk to you ab-a-ah, oh,
it just happened again!
Oh my god.(electronic beep)
Once you’ve found somebody that you want
to speak to. (sighs)(electronic beep)
It is, what is it? (laughs)(electronic beep)
Right my next tip is, rah,
rah, rawr! (laughs)(electronic beep)
It’s really, reallyimportant for fry. (laughs)
Fry people.(cheerful electronic music)