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如何克服完美主义和它带来的焦虑

How To Overcome Perfectionism And The Stress It Causes

I’m here today to help you know
今天我想要告诉你们
how to overcome perfectionism and all the stress that it causes.
如何克服完美主义及它所产生的压力
《生活目标》
Consider a challenge.
挑战一下
Are you ready you up for a challenge?
你准备好应对挑战了吗?
What I would love to have you do is run
我想让你能尽可能快地
as fast as you can to the horizon.
跑向地平线
And back as fast as you can.
然后再快速地跑回来
Ready?Go.
准备好了吗?出发
Could you do that?
你能做到吗?
There is a little problem, right?
还是有点困难 对吧?
What happens if you try to run to the horizon?
当你试图跑向地平线时会发生什么呢?
Well, the rising keeps running in and out in front of you
是的 地平线在你眼前渐行渐远
right?
对吧?
You never get any closer, why?
你永远无法靠近它 为什么呢?
The horizon is a concept.
地平线是一个概念
its a mental construct.
是一种精神构筑
It’s a psychological tool that
它是我们用来描述所感知那边的
we use to describe something that we perceive over there.
一种心理工具
It’s not a real place.
它并不存在
And that’s why you can’t run to the horizon.
这就是你无法到达的原因
As you think about that challenge,
当你想到那个挑战时
what does that have to do with perfectionism?
它与完美主义又有什么联系呢?
Perfectionism.
完美主义
That’s something that sometimes we wear as a badge of honor.
有时我们会把它作为荣誉的象征
“I’m a perfectionist”.
“我是一个完美主义者”
How’s that going for you?
你觉得怎么样?
Have you ever reached that horizon?
你曾抵达过地平线吗?
You haven’t, why?
没有 为什么呢?
Because perfection like the horizon is not a real place.
因为完美如地平线般并不存在
It’s a construct.
它是一种构造
It’s a psychological tool to understand something that we perceive.
它是我们用来理解感知的心理工具
But that you can’t reach.
但你不可能到达
so, why are we so driven toward perfection.
那么 我们为什么要追求完美
And then that causes a lot of stress too,doesn’t it?
而且它会造成诸多压力 不是吗?
Have you ever felt stressed out
你是否曾因为未达到完美
because you felt like ,”Oh, I’m not there yet.”
而感到压力重重呢?
Yean,you’re not going to get there.
是的 你不会达成的
Newsflash!
新闻快报!
You can’t reach the horizon.
你不可能到达地平线
It’s not a real place. I’ve had several experiences as a youth leader
它不存在 我有过几次这样的经验
with Scout groups, for example.
例如 我在童子军组织当过几次青年领袖
I would take these Boy Scouts out into the wilderness
我带这些童子军到野外去
and we’re learning how to use a compass.
教他们如何使用指南针
It’s called orienteering, right?
这叫定向运动 对吧?
And so, I want them to follow a certain course to get to a certain destination.
因此 我想要他们沿着特定的路线到达指定的目的地
So,I taught the scouts at that point,
所以 我在那个时候教过侦查兵
you find your compass bearing.
要自己找到指南针的方位
Let’s say that I want them to go northeast.
假设我想让他们去东北部
Okay,there’s North East on my compass.
是的 我的指南针上有东北方向
And you line yourself up behind North East.
那么你就在东北方向指针的后面
Now,the next thing I want you to do is look up to the horizon.
现在 接下来我想要你做的就是仰望地平线
I want you to find a big tree or a mountain peak or a tall building
我想要你找到在地平线方向的
over there on the horizon that is in that direction.
一棵大树或一座峰顶或一栋高楼
Now,go toward that.
现在 朝那边前进吧
Okay,so then they pace off
好了 然后他们就以40步
at 40 paces or whatever it is, right?
或者其它速度前进 对吗?
Toward the horizon.
朝地平线前进
Not to. Toward, not to.
不是到达 朝这个方向 不是到达
That’s going to change some things.
二者是有区别的
Keep that in mind for a minute. Toward that thing.
记住这一点 朝那个方向
You’re going that way.
你往那边走
And then when you get there,
然后当你到达那儿时
you find your new bearing.
你会找到新的方向
Now,I want to go this direction.
现在 我想朝这个方向走
For however many paces.
不管走多少步
Find something on the horizon that gives you a bearing.
在地平线上找个能给你方向感的东西
Something to go toward, not to.
朝它走 而不是到达那儿
I don’t want him to go to the mountain peak.
我不想让他去山顶
I don’t want to go to that tall pine tree.
我不想去那棵高大的松树
I simply want them to go that way.
我只是想让他们往那边走
Perfection.
完美
We get this idea in our head
我们脑子里有这样一个想法
that we’re supposed to be at the horizon.
我们应该在地平线上
What if we use that as our direction?
倘若我们以此为方向呢?
We want to go that way.
我们想走到那里
Toward,not to.
朝这个方向 而不是到达
It provides direction not destination.
它提供的是方向 不是目的地
How does this apply to your life?
这对你的生活适用吗?
What if you’ve been thinking that
如果你一直认为
you have to be a certain way as a parent?
你必须以某种方式成为一位家长呢?
You have to do a certain thing in your job.
你必须在工作中做某件事
You have to achieve a certain level of financial success.
你必须在经济上取得一定的成功
Whatever it is.
无论它是什么
that’s your direction.
那就是你的方向
Go toward that.
朝它前进吧
How are we going to overcome the perfectionism?
我们如何克服完美主义呢?
Stop judging your self based on the distance
不要根据你和地平线之间的距离
there remains between you and the horizon.
来判断你自己
That distance is always infinite.
那个距离总是无止境的
And you cannot close the gap.
你无法缩小这个差距
When you measure between a real place where you are
当你在一个真实的地方和一个想象的地方之间测量时
and an imaginary place –the horizon,
即地平线与你之间
you can’t come up with a good measurement or a distance there.
你不可能想到一个好的测量距离的方法
We need to have 2 actual end points to measure against.
我们需要有两个实际的终点来衡量
Here’s another tip:
下面是另一个提示
When you want to see how you’re progressing on your journey that way,
当你想看到你的旅程是如何进行的
pause for a minute.
暂停片刻
Look back.
回头看
See where you just came from.
看看你是从哪里来的
That’s a real place.
那儿是一个真实的地方
You can measure the distance
你能衡量从你的来处
from where you were to where you are now.
到你现在位置之间的距离
And see that you’ve made some progress.
看看你所取得的进展
Check it out.
看看吧
Have you gained some empathy
你在过去几年的经历中
in your experiences over the past few years?
获得了一些共鸣吗?
Hopefully you have if you’re paying attention.
倘若你有所留意 希望你有
Have you gained some experience?
你得到了一些经验吗?
Have you gained some knowledge?
你掌握了一些知识吗?
Yes,you have.
是的 你得到了
And you can measure how much you’ve gained.
你能衡量你收获了多少
Enjoy that?
享受吗?
Let yourself feel the accomplishment of having come that far.
让你自己感受行进如此之远的成就感吧
Wow,that feels good.
哇 那感觉真棒
Give yourself a moment to enjoy that.
给自己一点时间去享受
And then when you’ve had a chance to enjoy the progress
然后当你有机会享受你所取得的进步时
that you’ve made, come back to where you are,
回到你现在的位置
look at where you’re going toward.
看看你将走向何处
Okay?
好吗?
Not to.
不是到达
You’re not going to the rise toward the horizon and
你不会走到地平线 而是走向那里
continue your journey. This will help with the perfectionism, folks.
然后继续你的旅程 这对完美主义有帮助 伙伴们
You’re not supposed to go to,
你不应该到达
you’re going toward.
你应该朝那边走
I hope that helps.
我希望这有帮助
You remember earlier when I said
你还记得我前面说的
that sometimes we wear perfectionism as a badge of honor
有时候我们把完美主义当作荣誉的象征
like there’s something really important about that?
好像这真的很重要
Here’s something that people miss a lot of times.
这是人们经常错过的东西
Perfectionism is contrary to or in opposition to healthy relationships.
完美主义与健康的关系相反
Think about it. What if you were to achieve perfection?
想想看 如果你要达到完美呢?
First of all,
首先
that would be really weird because you’d be standing at the horizon.
那真的很奇怪 因为你站在地平线上
Do you remember the Truman Show with Jim Carrey?
你还记得金·凯瑞的《楚门的世界》吗?
And he was in this world
他生活在一个
that was this artificial world that he was being raised in a reality TV show.
在真人秀中长大的人造世界里
Fascinating movie.
多么有趣的电影
And the character in the movie played by Jim Carrey figured
而电影中由金·凯瑞所扮演的角色
out that there has to be something out there.
发现一定有什么东西在外面
And so he started off toward the horizon.
于是他向地平线走去
And the producers of this reality TV show was trying to
而这部真人秀的制作人狂风暴雨般
stop him with storms and all kinds of opposition
试图用各种各样的方式
to keep him from leaving the studio that was his world.
来阻止他离开这个属于他的世界的工作室
He actually ran into the horizon.
他真的跑到了地平线上
He’s on a boat, he runs right into their horizon.
他乘着船 直奔他们的地平线
And the human mind cannot even comprehend
人们心里甚至无法理解他的所作所为
this because if you run into the horizon,what are you thinking?
因为倘若你奔向地平线 你在想些什么呢?
Your mind tells you there’s got
你的理智告诉你
to be something on the other side of this thing.
事情一定有另一面
And that was true in the movie.
这在电影里是真的
And he’s kept searching around until he found an exit.
他在四周摸索着 直到他发现了一个出口
And he’s like,”So long.I’m out of here.”
他说 “再见 我要离开这里了”
What if you actually achieved perfection?
如果你真的做到完美呢?
Not only would that be really weird like in the movie.
这不仅会像电影里那样奇怪
You’d be thinking what’s on the other side of this.
你还会想另一面是什么呢
If you were to actually achieve perfection,
如果你真的要达到完美
you would not need anyone else in your world.
那么你的世界不再需要任何人
It would remove the opportunity for you to exchange with others.
这将使你失去与他们交流的机会
Because well, you’re perfect.
因为 你是完美的
You don’t need anything.
你不需要任何东西
That would destroy all of your relationships.
那会毁掉你所有的关系
A lot of people don’t think about that
很多人在追求完美时
when they’re striving for perfection,right?
都不会这么想 对吧?
That’s not a badge of honor.
那不是荣誉的象征
not a good thing.
不是一件好事
It’s not a place that you want to be.
它不是你想去的地方
It’s not even a place.
它甚至不存在
Remembering that perfectionism is contrary to relationships and exchange.
记住完美主义与人际关系和交流背道而驰
Might help you to put your mind in a place
也许能帮助你把你的思想
where you can actually handle things in a way that you’re not trying to reach the horizon.
处于一种不想到达地平线的境地来处理事情
If this video has helped you
倘若你这视频能帮助到你
and I sure hope that it has,
我真的希望它有所用
would you please consider sharing it with someone else
你能考虑和那些
who might be having the same questions?
可能有相同疑问的人分享吗?
We do daily videos here at Live On Purpose TV.
我们每天都会在《生活目标》电视上播放视频
Subscribe share and
请订阅分享
join us again tomorrow for the next episode.
明天再开观看我们的下一集吧
I’ll see you then.
再见

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视频概述

完美主义如触不可及的地平线般并不存在,那我们如何克服完美主义呢?一起来看视频吧

听录译者

收集自网络

翻译译者

杜若

审核员

审核员A

视频来源

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-kul4nYi6gA

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