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给《星球大战原力觉醒》换个结尾 – 译学馆
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给《星球大战原力觉醒》换个结尾

How Star Wars The Force Awakens Should Have Ended

叭叭啦啦噗 巴啦啦
Baap ba baaaaa!
哒哒噗啦嗒哒嗒塔嗒
Dat didlat dat dat dat dat
哒哒哒 嗒哒,哇哦
datdiddldat da Ooooh
我们现在不这样做了
We’re not doing that anymore.
对不起
Sorry
嘘!小声点
Shh! shh Shhh
开始了
It’s starting
《星战7——原力觉醒》换尾动漫
How Star Wars The Force Awakens Should Have Ended
向我展示黑暗
Show me the dark side
然后我会扼杀你的所有挚爱
and I will finish what you started…
祖父!
Grandfather.
呦吼!
*gasp*
我有一个孙子?!?!
I have a grandson too!?!?
尤达!欧比汪!
Yoda! OB-1!
你猜怎么着!
Guess what!
我当上爷爷啦啊!
I’m a grandpa!!!
哎呀我的老天!这什么时候才会结束呦!太搞笑了!
Oh my gosh! This is never going to end. This is amazing!
叛徒!
Traitor!
啥(纳尼?!)
huh?
哈是啊
Yeah!
么么哒啊哈哈哈哈
muahahaahaha!
啊哦哦哦哦哦!
AAAAAGH!
(BB-8鬼畜音频)
(BB-8 sounds)
啊 你是说要把他重启吗
What do you mean did you try turning him off and on again?
我敢打赌他们花了很多功夫去修理它
I’m sure they have tried everything to revive him.
喔啊啊啊啊啊哦哦哦!
WoooaaaaaaaAAAAAow!
嗷哧!感谢制造商!
Oh! Thank the maker!
(R2D2鬼畜音频)
(R2D2 sounds)
R2!我们居然认为你不中用!
R2, we thought you were done for!
(R2D2娇喘音频)
(R2-D2 sounds)
一个戏剧性的入口!
A dramatic entrance!
没时间了没时间了!我们正试图找到大师卢克!!
We don’t have time for that! We are trying to find Master Luke!
她身上的原力太强了!她没有经过训练但她怎么知道运用原力的?!?!
She is strong with the force! Untrained but stronger than she knows!
把我的宝贝给我!嘶撒嘶
Bring me the precious!
是的 最高领袖
Yes, Supreme Leader.
你是在谈论那个神奇的女孩 对吧?
You are talking about the girl, correct?
宝物!!!
Precious!
你会毁坏手铐并且准备打开囚门
You will remove these restraints and leave with the cell door open.
我将会打开手铐并且为你打开囚门
I will remove these restraints and leave with the cell door open.
然后你会让我找到可以逃生的船!
And you will escort me to a ship that I can escape in?!
我会让你找到逃生的船
And I will escort you to a ship that you can escape in.
噗嗤
*gasp*
呜呼呼啊啊!
Woohoohoo!
这 曾是死星
This was the Death Star
然而这是死星Ⅱ号
This was the second one
这是…弑星者基地
And this is Starkiller Base
(大喘气(#゚Д゚))这是个陷阱!!
*gasps* It’s a trap!
啊,我可以叫它死星Ⅲ号吗
Can we just call it Death Star 3?
只是放大了罢了
It’s the same exact thing just bigger!
我很认真的说!
I mean seriously!
好 现在我们该怎么开启防护?
Now, how do we take down the shields?
我可以启用盾牌 但前提是在地面上
I can disable the shields, but I have to be on the planet.
我们会带你去的
We’ll get you there.
如何?!
How?
要是我说了的话 你会愤怒的
If I told you, you wouldn’t like it.
盾牌系统刷新开始
The shields have a fractional refresh rate.
当我们穿过的时候让飞船的速度低于光速!
Keeps anything traveling slower than light speed from getting through.
我们要以光速着落?!??
We’re gonna make our landing approach at light speed?!
啦啦啦~
Raaawr!
啥?
How?!
如果我们以光速通过…
If we pass through the shields AT the speed of light…
哪来的时间再退出光速?!…撞击…
how can you even have enough time to drop out of the speed of light before crashing into the..
现在!!!!
And NOW!
噢噢我的老天!!!
Oh my!
嗯哼 不错的主意
Well… so much for that idea.
关闭盾牌!离开防护盾!
Shut the shields down!
要不我就二话不说把你头砍了!!
Or I’ll blow that bucket off your head!
啊啊啊哦,你说了吗?!
Oh. Did you say shut down the shields?
我以为你是说“让大家警惕你的到来!”
I thought you said, “Alert everyone to your presence!”
乔伊
Chewy.
我们完蛋了
We’re screwed.
嗷啊噢噢
Growl
你需要多加管教了!
You need a teacher!
我要开始了“攻击”你了……
I can show you the FORCE FEINT!
呵呵!
Ha Ha!
哈哈打你脸呢!你又倒了
Oh in your face! You fell for it again!
我赢了!
I win!
吶呐呐呐啦那
Na Na Na Na na na na na na!
我知道自己的使命
I know what I have to do
但我布吉岛自己有没有能力去做
but I don’t know if I have the strength to do it.
你会帮我吗
Will you help me?
当然
Anything.
惊喜!
Surprise!!!
本!
Ben!
啊啊啊啊啊哦!
Oooooooh!
虚弱的家伙
Weak!
啊啊昂昂!
Uuuuugh!
不啊啊啊啊…
NOOOOOOOO!
怎么了?!??
Why!?
怎么了!?!?!
WHY?!?!
你从哪冒出来的卢克?!?!
Where did you come from, Luke?!
住厌我的岛了
Got bored on my island.
你为什么不先开枪?!?
Why didn’t you shoot first, man?!
他是我的儿子!
He was my boy!
他明明是要杀了你!!!
He was going to kill you.
你怎么知道!?!?
How do you know that?!
每当你们这些家伙在危险中时,我就能感觉到。。
I always sense when you guys are in danger…
管你啥事
It’s kind of my thing.

*sigh*
莱雅会愤怒的!
Leia’s gonna be pissed!
哇——你——
Wow! You’re hot!
啥?
What?!
噗嗤
Gross!
我们可以联系!
We could be related!
再也不要找我的麻烦了!
Never bothered me before!
好吧…拜拜6——
Okay! Byyyyyye!
来玩个游戏吧
Let’s play a game
从一数到三,报出你最喜欢的动物
One the count of three name your favorite creature.
不要多想 就报 可以开始了吗?
Don’t even think about it. Just name it. Ready?
来啊嗨啊!
Okay!
一…二…三…
One… Two… Three…
仇恨!仇恨!啊哈哈
Rancor! Rancor!
银河系里最火爆的衣服!
Hottest clothing in the galaxy!
莱雅女仆装!啊哈哈
Slave Leia Costume! Slave Leia Costume!
如果你是少妇,整个银河系你会跟谁睡呢
If you were a chick, who’s the one guy in the whole galaxy you’d sleep with?
兰多•卡来西安兰多•卡来西安!
Lando Calrissian! Lando Calrissian!
啊啥?!?
WHAT?!
我们成为了最好的朋友了!?!?
Did we just become best friends!?
对啊
YEP!
我们忘记往事了吗啊哈哈
Did we forget we’re being shot at?
呀呵哈哈
YEP!
德拉得,请——
Droid Please!
哈哈哈哈!
hahahaha!
我必须补充:
I had to add that.
哈哈哈哈!
Ha Ha Ha Ha!
我喜欢你的眼神
I love your eyes.
呜啊啊啊!
RAWR!

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