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多拉勒斯事务所12

Ep 12 Doraleous and Associates

莫尔东
Mirdon
尼布斯
Neebs
德拉克
Drak
多拉勒斯
Doraleous
多勒拉斯事务所
Doraleous & Associates
伙计们 我们得保持专业性
Ok, guys, we need to stay professional here,
就是说不许吵架
and that means no arguing.
不能像平时那样争个不停
None of the bickering that usually goes on.
-好吧-好的 尼布斯
-Alright.-Yeah, Neebs.
我们没有斗过嘴
We do not ever bicker.
没错 我们什么时候吵过
Yeah, when do we argue?
-哪有 -有 尼布斯总是斗嘴!
-Not really.-No, Neebs argues all the time!
大家都吵架 不是吗
It’s every accent argue, isn’t it?
我没有吵过!
I don’t ever argue!
是你在吵!
It’s you argue!
谁?
Who?
停!停!
Stop! Stop!
看看 你没吵吗
Listen, do you argue?
你? 呵呵
You? Come on.
好了 尼布斯!闭嘴 可以吗?
Stop, Neebs! Zip it, okay?
不要吵了!
No arguing!
这帮人显然是群混蛋
Theses guys apparently are pricks.
我们要用善良感化他们
So we are going to kill them with kindness.
这就是计划
That’s the plan.
用善良感化他们
Kill them with kindness.
这是个好计划
That’s a good plan. That’s a good plan.
这计划很蠢 多拉勒斯
That is a stupid plan, Doraleous.
看着吧
Would you just watch?
莫尔东 闭嘴
But Mirdon, just shut up…
你才闭嘴 你这个矮肥猪
You shut up your fat little shrimp.
闭嘴! 现在行动
Shut up! Here we go.
咩国子民 我是多拉勒斯
People of Meh, my name is Doraleous!
这名字好蠢!
That’s a stupid name!
谢谢 非常感谢
Thank you! Thank you very much!
这是我的同伴
And these are my associates.
-差劲-什么?
-Fail.-Sorry?
巨差劲
Epic fail.
后面这些……
These are my associates behind…
你们真弱!
You look lame!
是我的同伴 我们是来保护贵国
behind me and we are here to help protect your kingdom
免受奥格多尼亚的攻击
from the Nudonia attack.
我们好得很
We are not roused.
咩 咩 咩 咩 咩
Meh , meh , meh , meh , meh .
-咩-带着头盔?
-Meh.-Wear the helmet?
-我们是来帮……-咩
-We are here to help…-Meh.
[音乐]
[Music]
万岁 Yahtzee陛下
All hail, Lord Yahtzee.
怎么了 我可不记得邀请过陌生人
What’s it on? I don’t recall if I invite a stranger.
抱歉 陛下
Ah, I’m sorry, sir!
我叫多拉勒斯
My name is Doraleous!
首先 我想说
First of all, let me, let me? to say…
我认为您的王国很漂亮
Uh, I think you have a very beautiful kingdom.
-然后呢-咩 咩 咩……
-So right!-Meh, meh, meh…
我不禁发现贵国兵微将寡 武器不足
I couldn’t help but notice that you’re severely outnumbered and outweaponed
因此特来相助 和平解决此事
and we’re here to help, like to help deal with this peacefully.
完全不同意
Not on the same page at all.
咩 咩 咩……
Meh, meh, meh…
不不 现在只需重新妥善分配供给
No, I think it’s a matter of just redirecting supply well
便可不必兵戈相见
so that your kingdoms don’t meet.
我想谈判是贵国唯一的选择
I think negotiation is your only option here.
毕竟敌方武器精良
I mean they’ve got some serious weapons over there.
我并不认为 咩 咩 咩
No. Meh, meh, meh…

Ah!
看 如我所言
See, that’s what I was talking about.
这巨石威力极大
That boulder was devastating.
有我等帮助便能避免此类伤亡
We can help you avoid this type of thing.
也没什么好避的 不是吗
Well, there is not too much to avoid now, isn’t it?
再说是谁不点火就投巨石的
And by the way, who shots a boulder at another army without first setting on fire?
就像蛋糕里没塞脱衣舞娘就送到单身派对上
It’s like sending a giant cake to a bachelor party forgetting to put the strip inside.
你的朋友们坐等啊等 越等越气
And your friends sit around waiting and waiting and waiting, getting more more pissed off
最后气得回家打老婆
until they eventually go home and beat their wives
就像我打算用鹅卵石杀人一样
just like I attempt to go and beat down some of them that pebble could have killed
况且几年前
Not to mention I believed I’ve heard about
我看过一篇关于鹅卵石的文章
said pebble in the newsletters I’ve read a few years ago
也许你还有印象 即使缓慢而可预料的攻击也能打到你
about slow predictable attacks would come your way if you’re heavily impressed.
但那巨石刚砸死了你四十来名士兵
But that boulder just took out like 40 of your men.
不过石头越小杀人越多
Em, since a small boulder has taken out more men,
你们觉得呢 咩国子民
What’s up, you, people of Meh?
咩 咩 咩
Meh , meh , meh …
多拉勒斯 5点钟方向
Doraleous, in coming 5 o’clock.
莫尔东 击碎它
Mirdon, take out that rock.

Got it.
尼布斯 干掉他们的投石兵
Neebs, take out their trigger shell.
没问题
You got a ground.
看 我们能帮上忙
See, we can be useful!
是 真了不起
Yes. You sweared it.
你们解决了数百迫在眉睫危险中的一个
You men made the one impending danger in the hundreds of tiny impending dangers.
为何不直接放火烧死他们
Why not just seal a deal of massive a bit more by making them flaming as well?
来找个乐子
Just for the fun of it.
不过别担心 我们很安全
But no worries cause we are safe anyway,
幸亏你们的那个精灵一箭射死一个投石兵
thanks to their elf single-handedly took down a single enemy,
真是很有用呢
which is going to be incredibly helpful.
但他们有一千人 近数都有箭
Considering their thousands of them, many have half dozen damn arrows.
我们来算一下
so let’s do a match,shall we?
看 几千名士兵减去六
Let’s see.We’ve got several thousands miners, six carried the two,
进两位后除以指着天上那巨石的那个老头
divided that by captain obviously pointing at the giant masses in the sky
等于我们彻底完蛋了
equals we’re completely screwed.
听着!我这辈子一直在谈判
Listen! I’ve been negotiating my entire life.
但如果那样不起作用
But, that doesn’t work.
我们都是训练有素的战士
We’ve all been trained in advanced combat tactics as well.
你要相信我们
You need to trust us.
对 相信你们 听起来真明智
Yeah, right! Trust you! That sounds wise.
信不信由你 其实我对你们有所耳闻
Cause believe it or not, I’ve actually heard a bit about you guys.
看 你们有个胆大 烦人 可有可无的精灵
Let’s see, you’ve got your fearless annoying more or less supporting elf
像一只被袜子盖住头的单脚狗一样听话
who follows direction as good as a rabbit one-legged dog with sock over his head
我还听说
And from what I’ve heard,
我要有儿子肯定比这个老头懂魔法
my son knows more magic from this fluid wonder I don’t even have a son.
还有这个拿斧子的肉球
What’s up to the fat little meat what to be with an axe.
有多少马屁就拍多少
kisses the amount of arse equivalent to the amount of arse
你要是边跳脱衣舞边卖鞋
that would show up to a tied teeny striptease, slash, shoed sale event.
如果把那破脑袋拧下来我估计能卖不少钱
I’d imagine you being more effective if you just kicked him in the bloody head,
有他那保龄球身体 估计一个人都过不来
so his fat bowling ball maybe not go over a bad guy or two.
对了多拉勒斯 你是怎么找到这些半吊子的
And Doraleous, how did you find this halfway
把一个遍地战士和野兽的地方重定义成庇护所的
to successfully redefine the sheltering in a land of warriors and monsters
那么多人不选偏选这几个
and planting other choices including not choosing anyone at all.
我是说 你怎么面试出结果的
I mean, how did you audition process go?
是关上门 灭了灯 然后扔三块石头?
Did you follow the rule, turn the lights, offer them three rocks?
怕不是石头砸中谁算谁
How did you could then you take off when fresh new headlocks
训话还要稿子
speak them with a log
一上战场就死了
and promote the battlefield only find out they’ve already dead
不过你不会介意
but you don’t mind,
因为你自己就会在两个操蛋的挑战间做决定
cause you make your own decisions with two challenges full of fuck off.
看这个图
I see a pattern here.
方块能放进圆洞吗 不能 这个也许可以
Does a square pay to took around hole, nope, maybe this square does.
你知道啥? 行了 行了
You know what? Fine, fine!
老子马上就滚
I’ll take my stupid name and go home.
祝你吉星高照!
So, good luck!
祝你旗开得胜!都祝你!
or good reasons or whatever!
欧 我的天啊 你可闭嘴吧
Oh, god know anything but that, please know not that
你们这群渣渣
you guys are exactly like cove.
要是我们被野蛮的甲虫大军困住了
if we’ve been threaten by a monstrous army of a giant club wilding beetles
欢迎你们来清理掉甲虫 扔掉鞋子
so you can come in up with cleaning the beetle, putting off our shoes.
没门
No way!
我觉得多拉勒斯在这件事情上做得很好
Well, I think Doraleous handle that pretty well.
你们觉得呢
What do you think?

Meh——
[音乐]
[music]

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视频概述

王之回击

听录译者

生活的阙

翻译译者

tu3535

审核员

审核员 LD

视频来源

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iTIujzldC5o

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