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对肥胖的恐惧到此为止

Enough with the fear of fat | Kelli Jean Drinkwater

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Light up the world
今天我要讲一讲 一个细思极恐的词
I’m here today to talk to you about a very powerful little word,
人们绞尽脑汁
one that people will do almost anything
想要避免与这个词有牵扯
to avoid becoming.
出于对这个词的恐惧
Billion-dollar industries thrive
几十亿产业蓬勃发展
because of the fear of it,
那些已经不可避免地与那个词紧密相连的人们
and those of us who undeniably are it
只能在无情的风暴中
are left to navigate a relentless storm
挣扎求索
surrounding it.
你们应该看出来了吧
I’m not sure if any of you have noticed,
我很胖
but I’m fat.
不用小心翼翼地在背后嘀咕
Not the lowercase, muttered-behind-my-back kind,
也不用善意地说这是丰满 可爱
or the seemingly harmless chubby or cuddly.
我更不是性感妖娆的类型
I’m not even the more sophisticated voluptuous or curvaceous kind.
我们实话实说吧
Let’s not sugarcoat it.
我就是典型的超级大胖子
I am the capital F-A-T kind of fat.
我就是这间房里的大象
I am the elephant in the room.
当我走上舞台
When I walked out on stage,
你们当中有些人一定在想
some of you may have been thinking,
哦吼 这场演讲有意思了
“Aww, this is going to be hilarious,
因为所有人都知道胖子很幽默
because everybody knows that fat people are funny.”
或者你们会想 这女人哪儿来的自信
Or you may have been thinking, “Where does she get her confidence from?”
世界上怎么会有自信的女胖子
Because a confident fat woman is almost unthinkable.
注重时尚的观众们
The fashion-conscious members of the audience
也许觉得这条贝丝·迪托【著名加大码女性服装品牌】的裙子
may have been thinking how fabulous I look
特别称我
in this Beth Ditto dress —
非常感谢
thank you very much.
但是有些人也许在想
Whereas some of you might have thought,
唔 黑色更显瘦啊
“Hmm, black would have been so much more slimming.”
你们或许会好奇
You may have wondered, consciously or not,
我有没有糖尿病 结没结婚
if I have diabetes, or a partner,
晚上7点后吃不吃饭
or if I eat carbs after 7pm.
然后开始担心自己昨天晚上吃的东西
You may have worried that you ate carbs after 7pm last night,
想着应该去健身房重新办一张会员卡
and that you really should renew your gym membership.
这些言论都带有偏见
These judgments are insidious.
它们不仅针对了个人 还针对了所有肥胖的人
They can be directed at individuals and groups,
也可能针对了自己
and they can also be directed at ourselves.
这样的想法被称为肥胖恐惧症
And this way of thinking is known as fatphobia.
与其他体制压迫一样
Like any form of systematic oppression,
肥胖恐惧症深埋于复杂的体系之下
fatphobia is deeply rooted in complex structures
我们只看到了资本主义 父权制 种族主义
like capitalism, patriarchy and racism,
却根本意识不到肥胖恐惧症的存在
and that can make it really difficult to see,
更不用说去挑战它了
let alone challenge.
我们生活于这样一个环境下
We live in a culture
长得胖就是坏人
where being fat is seen as being a bad person —
懒惰 贪婪 不健康 没有责任心
lazy, greedy, unhealthy, irresponsible
有违道德
and morally suspect.
而苗条的人在我们眼中
And we tend to see thinness
则往往代表了好人
as being universally good —
有责任心 成功
responsible, successful,
对饮食 身材 生活都掌控得很好
and in control of our appetites, bodies and lives.
这种想法我们见过太多了
We see these ideas again and again
在媒体言论 公共卫生政策 中
in the media, in public health policy,
在医生办公室里
doctors’ offices,
在日常交谈中
in everyday conversations
甚至成为我们的人生态度
and in our own attitudes.
我们甚至会责怪肥胖人群
We may even blame fat people themselves
他们所面对的歧视是由他们自己造成
for the discrimination they face
因为 毕竟如果他们不想被歧视 他们可以减肥啊
because, after all, if we don’t like it, we should just lose weight.
就这么简单
Easy.
这种抵制肥胖的偏见已经变得根深蒂固了
This antifat bias has become so integral, so ingrained
并且影响到我们如何评价自己以及他人
to how we value ourselves and each other
但我们很少会反思我们为何如此鄙视胖子
that we rarely question why we have such contempt for people of size
还有这种歧视从何而来
and where that disdain comes from.
但是我们必须要直视这个问题
But we must question it,
因为过于注重对外形的看法
because the enormous value we place on how we look
影响到我们每一个人
affects every one of us.
我们真的想生活在一个
And do we really want to live in a society
由于接受不了另类的自己
where people are denied their basic humanity
从而否定自己的社会中吗
if they don’t subscribe to some arbitrary form of acceptable?
当我六岁的时候
So when I was six years old,
我姐姐曾在我们的车库里教一群小女孩跳芭蕾
my sister used to teach ballet to a bunch of little girls in our garage.
在那群女孩中 我的高度和围度都要大一截
I was about a foot taller and a foot wider than most of the group.
当我们的首秀来临时
When it came to doing our first performance,
我非常激动能穿上可爱的粉红芭蕾舞短裙
I was so excited about wearing a pretty pink tutu.
穿上它 我就能成为闪闪发光的小仙女
I was going to sparkle.
当其他女孩都能轻松穿上薄纱裙子时
As the other girls slipped easily into their Lycra and tulle creations,
没有一件芭蕾舞短裙适合我穿
not one of the tutus was big enough to fit me.
我一心想要参加那个表演
I was determined not to be excluded from the performance,
所以我对着我妈妈
so I turned to my mother
用每个人都能听到的声音说
and loud enough for everyone to hear
妈妈 我不要[tutu]芭蕾舞裙/[twotwo]二二【tutu与twotwo谐音】
said, “Mom, I don’t need a tutu.
我要四四
I need a fourfour.”
谢了 老妈
Thanks, Mom.
但是当时我并没有意识到
And although I didn’t recognize it at the time,
穿上漂亮四四舞裙的我
claiming space for myself in that glorious fourfour
迈向了一个名副其实的胖子的第一步
was the first step towards becoming a radical fat activist.
我的意思不是说
Now, I’m not saying that this whole body-love thing
自从那天起
has been an easy skip along a glittering path of self-acceptance
由于热爱自己的身体 我就自然而然地接受了肥胖的自己
since that day in class.
才不是呢
Far from it.
不久我意识到远离主流人群认为正常的生活方式
I soon learned that living outside what the mainstream considers normal
是沮丧而孤立的
can be a frustrating and isolating place.
我花了二十年来探索这个原因
I’ve spent the last 20 years unpacking and deprogramming these messages,
中间的过程几经起伏
and it’s been quite the roller coaster.
我曾被过往的车辆嘲笑 谩骂
I’ve been openly laughed at, abused from passing cars
他们说我是痴心妄想
and been told that I’m delusional.
我也收到过陌生人的微笑
I also receive smiles from strangers
他们意识到我昂着头迈着轻松的步伐走上街
who recognize what it takes to walk down the street
需要多大的勇气
with a spring in your step and your head held high.
谢谢
Thanks.
一直以来 那个勇敢的六岁小女孩一直伴随着我
And through it all, that fierce little six-year-old has stayed with me,
是她帮助我这个坦荡的胖子
and she has helped me stand before you today
今天能够站在你们面前
as an unapologetic fat person,
我拒绝认同
a person that simply refuses to subscribe
我这种身体存活在这世上就是个累赘
to the dominant narrative
这种主流思想
about how I should move through the world in this body of mine.
我并不是孤军奋战
And I’m not alone.
我是国际社会人群中的一员
I am part of an international community of people
这些人群决定 与其被动接受
who choose to, rather than passively accepting
我们的身躯也许会一直这样庞大
that our bodies are and probably always will be big,
不如积极地让我们的身体就这样闪耀
we actively choose to flourish in these bodies as they are today.
我们对自己的力量引以为豪 好好利用
People who honor our strength and work with, not against,
而不是排斥我们的感知限制
our perceived limitations,
我们重视健康
people who value health
多过重视
as something much more holistic
落伍的体重指数图表上的数字
than a number on an outdated BMI chart.
相反的 我们把心理健康 自我价值 自己身体的感觉
Instead, we value mental health, self-worth and how we feel in our bodies
视为整体健康的重要部分
as vital aspects to our overall well-being.
我们不相信这个肥胖的身体
People who refuse to believe that living in these fat bodies
是生活的障碍
is a barrier to anything, really.
医生 学者 博主们
There are doctors, academics and bloggers
写了无数
who have written countless volumes
有关这个复杂主题的文章
on the many facets of this complex subject.
注重时尚的胖子们通过穿胖基尼和露脐装
There are fatshionistas who reclaim their bodies and their beauty
来展示他们的身体和美丽
by wearing fatkinis and crop tops,
暴露出我们应该藏起来的肉体
exposing the flesh that we’re all taught to hide.
胖子运动员们
There are fat athletes
跑马拉松 教瑜伽或者打拳击
who run marathons, teach yoga or do kickboxing,
他们做的这些事都是在狠狠地打现实的脸
all done with a middle finger firmly held up to the status quo.
这些人教会我 激进的身体政治
And these people have taught me that radical body politics
是我们身体羞耻文化的解药
is the antidote to our body-shaming culture.
但我要说清楚 我的意思不是说
But to be clear, I’m not saying that people shouldn’t change their bodies
就算人们想要改变体型也别去改变
if that’s what they want to do.
重塑自己是热爱自我的最佳形式
Reclaiming yourself can be one of the most gorgeous acts of self-love
并且能使自己千变万化
and can look like a million different things,
从改变发型到纹身到塑形
from hairstyles to tattoos to body contouring
再到注射荷尔蒙到整形手术 当然还有减重
to hormones to surgery and yes, even weight loss.
很简单 这是你的身体
It’s simple: it’s your body,
你才能决定什么才是对身体最好的
and you decide what’s best to do with it.
我塑造自我的方式
My way of engaging in activism
是做所有胖子们不应该做的事
is by doing all the things that we fatties aren’t supposed to do,
并邀请别人加入我 使其艺术化
and there’s a lot of them,
这是其中的一些
inviting other people to join me and then making art about it.
普通的丝线衣服
The common thread through most of this work
都不适合胖子穿
has been reclaiming spaces that are often prohibitive to bigger bodies,
从走猫步到俱乐部秀
from the catwalk to club shows,
从公共游泳池到舞台
from public swimming pools to prominent dance stages.
人们的加入不仅是个绝佳的艺术呈现
And reclaiming spaces en masse is not only a powerful artistic statement
还是个根本的社区建设方法
but a radical community-building approach.
这是”AQUAPORKO”【游泳队名字】
This was so true of “AQUAPORKO!” —
脂肪游泳队
the fat fem synchronized swim team
是我在悉尼跟一群朋友创建的
I started with a group of friends in Sydney.
一群穿戴着花泳帽和泳衣的胖女人们
The impact of seeing a bunch of defiant fat women
肆无忌惮地挥舞着她们的腿
in flowery swimming caps and bathers
这个场景的影响力
throwing their legs in the air without a care
不可小觑
should not be underestimated.
在我的职业生涯中 我认识到肥胖的身体有着固有的政治性
Throughout my career, I have learned that fat bodies are inherently political,
一具坦坦荡荡的肥胖身体
and unapologetic fat bodies
能颠覆人们的思想
can blow people’s minds.
当广受好评的舞蹈团Force Majeure【舞蹈公司名称】
When director Kate Champion,
导演凯特
of acclaimed dance theater company Force Majeure,
请我加入由胖舞者组建的
asked me to be the artistic associate
一个舞蹈的艺术协会时
on a work featuring all fat dancers,
我是跳着去拥抱这个机会的
I literally jumped at the opportunity.
我说的是真的跳着
And I mean literally.
“没什么可失去” 是跟大号表演者们合作的作品
“Nothing to Lose” is a work made in collaboration with performers of size
灵感来自于他们的生活经历
who drew from their lived experiences
创造出的作品犹如我们那般的多变和真实
to create a work as varied and authentic as we all are.
正如你想的那样这个作品并不是芭蕾舞
And it was as far from ballet as you could imagine.
这个著名公司的创意
The very idea of a fat dance work by such a prestigious company
就是使这个舞蹈充满争议性
was, to put it mildly, controversial,
因为在这个世界上
because nothing like it had ever been done on mainstream dance stages before
没有哪个主流舞台有过这样的表演
anywhere in the world.
人们会怀疑
People were skeptical.
你说的胖舞者是什么意思
“What do you mean, ‘fat dancers?’
体型10号 12号那种胖子吗【10和12号服装在欧美属于大码】
Like, size 10, size 12 kind of fat?
他们在哪里练舞呢
Where did they do their dance training?
他们有耐力做拉伸吗
Are they going to have the stamina for a full-length production?”
尽管备受怀疑
But despite the skepticism,
“没什么可失去”在悉尼节虚无坐席
“Nothing to Lose” became a sellout hit of Sydney Festival.
人们对表演好评如潮 我们也开始巡演
We received rave reviews, toured,
还获得了奖项 并被超过27种语言报道
won awards and were written about in over 27 languages.
世界各地都能看到这些演员的令人震惊的图像
These incredible images of our cast were seen worldwide.
我无数次听到不同体型的人
I’ve lost count of how many times people of all sizes
告诉我这个表演改变了他们的生活
have told me that the show has changed their lives,
这个表演是如何帮助他们改变
how it helped them shift their relationship
自身和别人身体的关系
to their own and other people’s bodies,
如何帮助他们克服自身障碍
and how it made them confront their own bias.
当然了 触动人心的作品
But of course, work that pushes people’s buttons
往往都伴有各种诋毁
is not without its detractors.
有人说我胖得要命
I have been told that I’m glorifying obesity.
我曾受到过死亡威胁
I have received violent death threats
因为以肥胖人群的身体和生活为核心来创作而遭到辱骂
and abuse for daring to make work that centers fat people’s bodies and lives
把我们当成茶余饭后的谈资
and treats us as worthwhile human beings with valuable stories to tell.
甚至有人叫我
I’ve even been called
“肥胖瘟疫的伊斯兰国【恐怖组织】”
“the ISIS of the obesity epidemic” —
这个评论荒唐得可笑
a comment so absurd that it is funny.
但这些评论也致使肥胖
But it also speaks to the panic,
激起了人们的恐慌
the literal terror,
害怕
that the fear of fat can evoke.
正是这种恐惧滋生了节食行业
It is this fear that’s feeding the diet industry,
而节食行业使得我们无法坦然正视对自己的体型
which is keeping so many of us from making peace with our own bodies,
因为这种恐惧 我们在开始正常生活之前
for waiting to be the after-photo
只能委曲求全
before we truly start to live our lives.
这里真正的大象是有肥胖恐惧症的人
Because the real elephant in the room here is fatphobia.
肥胖激进主义拒绝放任这种恐惧
Fat activism refuses to indulge this fear.
通过唤起人们的自决以及对肥胖者的尊重
By advocating for self-determination and respect for all of us,
我们改变了社会的态度 从不情愿到接受多元化
we can shift society’s reluctance to embrace diversity
并开始以各种方式庆祝拥有这副身体
and start to celebrate the myriad ways there are to have a body.
谢谢
Thank you.

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