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何必追赶幸福,要懂得反脆弱

Don’t chase happiness. Become antifragile | Tal Ben-Shahar | Big Think

– There are only two kinds of people
世上只有两种人
who do not experience painful emotions.
没有经历过痛苦的情绪
The first kind are the psychopaths.
第一种是精神病患者
The second kind are dead.
第二种是死者
(bell tolls)
(钟声)
(mournful music)
(悲伤的音乐)
There is a false understanding or expectation
有一种错误的理解或者说是期望认为
that a happy life means being happy all the time.
幸福的生活意味着时刻开心
No!
不!
Learning to accept, and even embrace painful emotions
学会去接受 甚至是包容悲痛的情绪
is an important part of a happy life.
是幸福生活重要的一部分
And the study of painful emotions
对于悲痛情绪的研究
is an important part of the field of happiness studies.
是幸福研究领域重要的一部分
My name is Tal Ben Shahar.
我叫Tal Ben shahar
I’m a student and teacher in the field of happiness studies.
我是幸福研究领域的学习者也是教授者
And my most recent book is “Happier, No Matter What”.
我最近出版了一本书叫《不论怎样要更加幸福》
在艰辛中追寻幸福
There is a very important concept that was introduced by Nassim Taleb.
Nassim Taleb引入了一个重要的概念
And that is antifragility.
那便是反脆弱
Antifragility is essentially resilience 2.0.
反脆弱实质上是心理弹性2.0版本
Resilience 1.0 is when we put pressure on a system,
适应力1.0是当我们向一个系统施压
after the pressure is lifted,
在压力解除后
that system goes back to its original form.
系统会反弹回原始形态
Antifragility takes this idea a step further.
反脆弱将这一想法进一步深化
You put pressure on a system. It actually grows bigger, stronger.
当我们向系统施压 它会变得更大更强
We see antifragile systems all around us and within us.
我们自身及周边都能见到反脆弱系统
For example, our muscular system.
比如 我们的肌肉系统
We go to the gym and we lift weights.
我们到体育馆举重
We’re putting pressure on our muscles.
我们向肌肉施加压力
What happens as a result, we actually grow stronger.
结果是 我们变得更强壮了
We’re an antifragile system.
我们就是一个反脆弱系统
On the psychological level, you know what that’s called?
在心理学层面上 你知道这叫什么吗
PTG post traumatic growth.
PTG 创伤后成长
So where post-traumatic stress disorder, PTSD,
创伤后应激反应即PDST
is about breaking down,
是关于情绪崩溃的
post traumatic growth is about growing stronger as a result of pressure of stress.
创伤后成长则是指由于压力而变得更强大
It’s antifragility.
这就是反脆弱
The role of the science of happiness
幸福科学的作用
is to teach us what conditions
是教会我们可以设置哪些条件来
we can put in place to increase the likelihood of growing from hardship.
增加从困难中获得成长的可能性
Now, there is a paradox when it comes to pursuing happiness.
现在 对于追寻幸福存在一个矛盾
On the one hand, we know that happiness is a good thing,
一方面 我们知道幸福是美好的事物
whether in and of itself,
不论是其自身
or as a means toward other ends.
还是作为实现其他目的的手段
At the same time, we also know from research by Iris Moss and others,
同时 我们也能从Iris Moss和其他人的研究中知道
that people who say to themselves,
那些对自己说
“Happiness is important for me, I want to pursue it,”
“幸福对我重要 我想要得到它”的人
those individuals actually end up being less happy.
最终往往不会很幸福
In fact, they’re more likely to experience depression.
事实上 他们更可能经历失落
So the paradox is that
所以矛盾就是
on the one hand, happiness is clearly a good thing.
一方面 很明显幸福是美好的事物
On the other hand, valuing it as a good thing is problematic.
另一方面 将其视为美好的事物是有问题的
So what do we do?
所以 我们要怎么做?
The way to resolve this paradox is
解决这个矛盾的办法是
that we pursue happiness indirectly.
我们要间接地追求幸福
Think about sunlight.
想象一下阳光
So if I look at the sun directly, it’s going to hurt my eyes.
如果我直视太阳 我的眼睛会受伤
However, if I break down sunlight into its elements,
但是如果我将阳光分解为其组成元素
into its constituents,
或是组成成分
I can look at the colors of the rainbow.
我便可以看到彩虹的颜色
So I’m indirectly looking at the sunlight,
那么我间接地看到了阳光
enjoying it, savoring it.
享受它 欣赏它
In the same way, pursuing happiness directly
同样地 直接追求幸福
can cause more harm than good.
会给我们带来更多伤害而非好处
But breaking it down into its elements
但是将它分解为组成元素
can lead us to enjoy the indirect pursuit of happiness,
便能让我们享受到间接追求来幸福
and by extension, to raise our overall levels of happiness.
并且进一步 提高我们的整体幸福水平
What are the metaphorical colors of the rainbow
当提及幸福的彩虹的时候
when it comes to happiness?
它的象征颜色是什么呢
Here we have what I’ve come to call the SPIRE model.
在这里我称它为SPIRE模型
And it can trigger the antifragile system.
它可以触发反脆弱系统
SPIRE is an acronym that stands for spiritual, physical, intellectual,
SPIRE是精神幸福 身体健康 智力健康
relational, and finally, emotional well-being.
关系和睦和情绪健康的英文首字母缩写
Spirituality is about finding a sense of meaning and purpose in life,
精神幸福是指找到生活中的意义和目标
at work and at home.
包括工作上和家庭上
If you wake up in the morning with a purpose,
如果你早上带着目标醒来
you’re more likely to overcome barriers.
那么你会更有可能克服阻碍
When it comes to physical wellbeing,
当提及身体健康时
the most important idea to look at is stress–the silent killer.
最重要的关注点是压力 这个无声的杀手
In the United States, more than half of the employees
在美国 超过半数的员工
do not use up their vacation time.
不能过完他们的假期时间
And even those that do,
即使是过完假期的人中
close to half are still tethered to their work.
也有近半数的人被工作所束缚
The problem is not the stress, it’s the lack of recovery.
问题不在于压力 而在于缺乏恢复力
With intellectual wellbeing, there’s research showing
在智力健康方面 有研究显示
that people who are curious, who ask questions
有好奇心的人 爱提问的人
are not just happier,
不仅仅更快乐
they also live longer.
他们的寿命也更长
Another important element is not just asking questions,
不仅仅是问问题 还有一个重要的因素是
it’s deeply engaging with material.
智力健康和物质息息相关
It can be text, a work of art, even nature.
可以是一场考试 一件艺术品作乃至自然
Relational wellbeing is very important.
关系和睦十分重要
The number one predictor of happiness
幸福的第一预言者
is quality time we spend with people we care about and who care about us.
是我们和关心我们 我们关心的人在一起的时间
And it turns out the number one condition that we can put in place
事实证明 要提高困苦中培养反脆弱的可能性
to increase the likelihood of antifragility of growing through hardship
我们设置的首要条件就是
is the quality of our relationships.
提高我们的关系质量
Finally, emotional wellbeing.
最后 情绪健康
So embracing painful emotions is critical,
拥抱悲痛的情绪是不正确的
but how do we then cultivate pleasurable ones?
但是随后我们要如何培养快乐的情绪呢
Specifically, the emotion of gratitude.
特别是 感激之情
Cicero talked about, “Gratitude is the mother of all virtues.”
西塞罗曾说 感恩是一切美德之母
When we appreciate the good in our life, we have more of it.
当我们感激生活中的美好 我们会收获更多
So happiness is much more than pleasure.
所以 幸福不仅是快乐
Happiness is wholebeing.
幸福是一个整体的存在
These five elements together create that sunlight–happiness.
五种元素共同缔造了生命的阳光 幸福
I don’t think there is a point before which one is unhappy,
我不认为在某个时间点之前 一个人是不快乐的
after which one is happy.
在这个时间点之后就会变得快乐
Rather, happiness resides on a continuum.
更确切地说 幸幅存在于一个连续的闭环中
It’s a lifelong journey.
是一个终身的旅程
And knowing that, we can have realistic
懂得这个 我们便能对可能实现的事
rather than unrealistic expectations about what is possible.
有实际的期待 而非不切实际
I do not think that things necessarily happen for the best.
我不认为事物必然有好的结局
However, we can learn to make the best of things that happen.
相反 我们可以学着把发生的事情做到最好
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视频概述

我们盲目追求幸福,认为幸福的人一定总是快乐的。但,事实真的是这样吗?未必!该视频用阳光和彩虹的关系向我们阐释了什么是真正的幸福,为了真正的幸福我们应该怎么做。

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收集自网络

翻译译者

人间美好,星河闪耀🌟

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视频来源

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e-or_D-qNqM

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