In life, there will be times to have to be around
and deal with difficult people.
Dr. Irene Strauss cohan’s has helpful advice regarding this.
Dr. Irene Strauss Cohan is a psychologist,
an avid blogger and a professor at Barry University.
advising in the Department of counseling.
Her main area of interest is helping people
build foundations in their relationships and keep them strong.
She’s passionate about improving people’s sense of self
and helping them be the best version they can be.
Dr. Strauss makes it a point
that there is no real difference between a difficult person
and someone who needs help.
Because most of the time they’re one in the same.
She says you aren’t going to be unpleasant or hurtful to people
unless you feel that way inside about yourself.
I don’t know if those people specifically need love and care.
Some of those people may not be in the space to accept the love,
no matter how loving and caring the other person is.
Dealing with a difficult person can prove more challenging
if it happens to be a family member
and especially if you live with them.
It isn’t easy to be around people
that seem to always bring your mood down,
Dr. Strauss observed, adding
there is not one easy answer to this.
Dr. Strauss suggests
to manage yourself and your anxiety around that person.
Try to understand them through their upbringing and story.
Ultimately, try to accept them for who they are.
If you can understand a person,
you can better manage emotions around them without feeling so reactive.
Dr. Strauss also suggests
to pay attention to your own behaviors and triggers.
Perhaps there’s something you do
that allows the person to negatively influence and bring you down.
She reveals “I’ve gotten to the point where
I can be around some difficult people
without feeling the need to be so reactive,
fix them to make them happier or want to avoid them.
It was hard for me to be around difficult people in my own family,
because I wanted to see people happy all the time.
Once I accepted that I wasn’t responsible for their happiness
I eased up a bit.
Dr. Strauss admits that people can influence each other.
And growing up in an environment that is constantly negative
can affect how you see and relate to the world.
But if you create a life balance it is less likely to happen.
Dr. Strauss adds,
when it comes to family we can’t really choose,
I think we all have a negative family member or difficult person
that most of us try to avoid.
I don’t think that one person can ruin your positive disposition entirely.
When around negative or even highly positive people,
I remember that all of that derives from their anxiety.
For some people’s negativity comes from being a highly anxious person.
And for others being positive may help them reduce it.
All of the negative is usually exaggerated from an anxious person.
If you can manage your own anxiety
and look at the facts of whatever the person is negative about,
it won’t bother you as much.
It’s easy to spot a difficult person according to Dr. Strauss.
They tend to make everything about themselves,
have few friends and are hypersensitive.
It’s normal to have a disagreement with anyone,
so that isn’t always an indication.
Also if you find everyone difficult to deal with,
you should probably take a look in the mirror.
One of the keys to dealing with difficult people
is making sure you make time for self-care.
Find something you enjoy and do it
and this can be different for everyone.
Relentless positivity isn’t necessarily though,
as Dr. Strauss describes,
some situations suck and that needs to be acknowledged.
I think if people could accept their situations as is
and be more factual about them.
then after they will be able to see the light at the end of the tunnel.
getting a flat tire on the way to an important meeting
isn’t a fun situation.
But if you acknowledge it, manage yourself to destress,
find a way to fix the tire and then reschedule your meeting.
it will help you later to see the positive of the situation.
After the fact you can say
“okay that wasn’t so bad”
and at least no one was hurt and everything worked out.
So what are your thoughts?
Be sure to comment below
and visit Dr. Strauss’s website.
A link can be found in the description.
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