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奇妙的爱与非传统婚姻

A queer vision of love and marriage | Tiq Milan and Kim Katrin Milan

Tiq Milan: Our first conversation was on Facebook,
列・米兰(TM):我们的 第一次对话是在Facebook
and it was three days long.
那长达三天之久
(Laughter)
(笑声)
We shared over 3,000 messages between us,
我们之间分享了超过3000条讯息
and it was during those 72 hours
在那72小时里
that I knew she was going to be my wife.
我就知道了 她将成为我的妻子
We didn’t wait any prerequisite amount of time for our courtship;
我们没有为我们的恋爱 等待那些建议的时间;
we told each other the vulnerable truths up front:
我们事先就告诉了彼此 那脆弱的真相:
I am a transgender man,
我是一名变性男性
which means the F on my birth certificate should have stood for”False,”
意思就是我出生证上的字母F 应该代表单词“错误的”
instead of”Female.”
而非“女性”
(Laughter)
(笑声)
Walking around as a woman in the world felt
在这个世界上 以女性的身份走来走去
like walking with pebbles in my shoes.
感觉就像是鞋里的鹅卵石杠着脚
It took the rhythm out of my swagger,
它使我无法昂首阔步
it threw me off balance,
它使我失去平衡
it pained me with every step I took forward.
它让我的每一步前行都感到疼痛
But today I’m a man of my own intention;
但今天 我自愿成为男性;
a man of my own design.
我设计了自己
Kim Katrin Milan: I am a cisgender queer woman.
吉姆・凯特林・米兰(KKM): 我是一名顺性别的性别认同疑惑女性
Cisgender means the gender I was assigned at birth
顺性别的意思是 我出生时是一名女性
is still and has always been female.
现在 一直以来都还是女性
This doesn’t make me natural or normal,
但并不因此我就变得自然或正常
this is just one way of describing the many different ways
这只是用于描述 我们在这个世界上存在的
that we exist in this world.
各种形态中的一种
And queer is a cultural term, but
queer是一个文化术语 (可以表示古怪的 或是俚语同性恋)
in this case, it refers to the
但是在这种语境中
way that I’m not restricted by gender
是指我并不严格受到我的性别限制
when it comes to choosing partners.
去选择我的另一半
I’ve identified in a few different ways —
我找到了一些不同的方式来描述—
as a bisexual, as a lesbian — but for me,
—作为一名双性恋 一名女同性恋— —但是对于我来说
queerness encompasses all of the layers
性别认同疑惑这个词包括了
of who I am and how I’ve loved.
我的全部 还有我爱的方式
I’m layers, and not fractions.
我是多层的 而不是分裂的
And for me, the fact that he was queer meant
对我来说 他也是性别认同疑惑者的事实
that I could trust his courtship from the very beginning.
意味着我从一开始 就能够信任他对我的爱
As queer and trans people,
作为同性恋和跨性别人群
we’re so often excluded from institutions and traditions.
我们是如此经常的 被制度和传统拒之门外
We create spaces outside of convention,
我们在传统之外创建了新空间
including the conventions of time.
也突破了包括时间的传统
And in those 3,000 messages between us,
在我们之间的那3000条信息
we collapsed time; we queered it;
我们使时间崩塌; 我们毁坏了它;
we laid it all on the table.
我们把它全部放在了台面上
(Laughter)
(笑声)
With no pretense at all.
没有任何的虚假
And this meant
这就意味着我们可以
that we were able to commit to each other
用截然不同的方式
in a profoundly different way.
对彼此做出承诺
So often what we’re told is this idea of the”Golden Rule,”
我们经常被告知那个“黄金条约”
that we should treat other people the way we want to be treated.
就是己所不欲 勿施于人
But the problem with that
但是问题是
is that it assumes
这是建立在我们作为他人
that we are the standard for other people,
的标准的假想之上的
and we’re not.
但我们并不是
We need to treat other people
“己所不欲
the way they want to be treated,
勿施于人”的 意思是我们
which means we had to ask.
要张口询问别人要什么
I couldn’t assume that the kind of love that Tiq needed
我不能保证我所想要的那种爱
was the same kind of love that I needed.
和列想要的是同一种
So I asked him everything —
所以我就问他所有的一切
about his fears, his insecurities —
-关于他的担忧 不安全感-
and we started from there. TM:
我们从那里开始TM:
I didn’t know what kind of love I needed.
我不知道我想要什么样的爱
I had just come out of a year-long fog
我刚刚走出长达一年的灰暗期
of being rejected and utterly depleted.
在其中 我被排斥
I had someone look me in my eyes
被彻底删除有些人看着我的眼睛
and tell me that I was unworthy of their love because I was trans.
告诉我 我不值得他们的爱 因为我是跨性别人群
And there’s a culture of lovelessness that we’ve created around transgender people.
我们创造了跨性别人群身边的 爱的文化
It’s reasoned, justified and often signed into law.
这是合理的 正当的 被法律认可的
And I was a heartbeat away from internalizing that message,
我差一点点就认同了那些信息——
that I wasn’t worthy.
我不值得
But Kim said that I was her ideal —
但吉姆说我是她的理想型——
the heartbroken mess that I was.
即使是我心碎是的糟糕样子
(Laughter) KKM:
(笑声)KKM:
He totally was my ideal.
他完全是我的理想型
(Laughter)
(笑声)
In more ways than one.
在很多方面都是这样
Both poets, writers, creatives
我们都是诗人 作家 创想者
with a long history of community work behind us,
参加过很长时间的社区工作
and big, huge dreams of a family in front of us,
在我们面前还有家庭的大梦想
we shared a lot of things in common,
我们有很多共同点
but we were also incredibly different.
但是我们又非常不同
I’ve been a lifelong traveler and a bit of an orphan,
我一生都在旅行 从某种程度来说也算是孤儿
whereas he comes from a huge family,
而他则来自一个巨大的家庭
and definitely stays grounded.
过着绝对安定的生活
I often kind of sum up the differences in our strengths
我经常把我们之间的优势差异
by saying,”Keep me safe, and I’ll keep you wild.”
总结为 “你给我安定 我给你放纵自由 ”
(Laughter) TM:
(笑声)TM:
We have marginalized identities but we don’t live marginalized lives.
我们虽然有着边缘化的身份 但我们并不是边缘化地生活着
Being queer and trans is about creating new ways of existing.
作为性别认同疑惑 跨性别人群 我们创造了新的生存方式
It’s about loving people as they are,
爱一个人要爱这个人本身
not as they’re supposed to be.
而不是爱他应该被赋定的价值
Kim is unapologetically feminine
在这个往往对
in a world that is often cruel and violent
那些太过自信或放纵的女性
to women who are too proud and too freeing.
往往残酷暴力的世界里 吉姆是充满女人味的
And I didn’t enter into this union
和她在一起
under the auspices
我没有把她当作
that she was going to be my helper or my rib,
我的帮手 或是我的附属
but a fully complex —
她是一个复杂的个体
(Laughter) KKM:
(笑声)
Right? That’s not right. TM:
KKM:对吗?那是不对的
But a fully complex human being
TM:是一个完全复杂的人
whose femininity wasn’t for me to rein in, control or critique.
而不是一个让我去统治 控制或是批判的女性
It’s her brilliance, the way she leads with compassion,
和她在一起 是因为她的聪明才智 她发挥同情心的方式
and how she never loses sight of her empathy.
她一直以来坚守的那份同情心
She has been my hero since day one.
她从第一天起就变为了我的英雄
(Applause) KKM:
(掌声)KKM:
Our relationship has always been about setting each other free.
在我们的关系中 我们 一直都给予彼此自由
One of the first questions I asked him
我首先问他的那些问题中
was what dreams he had left to accomplish,
有一个就是有没有什么 没有完成的梦想
and how would I help him get there.
我可以怎样帮助他完成
His dreams to live as a poet,
他的梦想是以一名诗人的身份生活
to adopt and raise a family together,
收养孩子 养活一个家庭
to live a life that he was proud of,
过一个他自己感到骄傲的人生
and one that would live up to his mother’s incredible legacy.
做一个不辜负母亲庞大遗产的人
And I really appreciated
我很开心我们能够
that we were able to start from that place,
从那个角度开始对话
and not from a place that was around figuring out
而尝试找到一个角度
how to make each other work together.
让我们能相互接受
And I think this really allowed
我认为这让我们变成了
us to grow into the people that we were
我们现在这样
in a way that was incredibly different.
以一种完全不同的方式
I love him whole; pre-transition, now and in the future.
我全身心地爱他; 变性前 现在还有将来
And it’s this love that had us committed to each other
是这样一份爱让我们忠于彼此
before we’d even seen each other’s faces. TM:
即使是在看见彼此相貌之前TM:
My mother’s biggest concern when I transitioned
当我变性时 我母亲最担心的
was who was going to love me as I am.
就是谁会爱这样一个我
Had being transgender somehow precluded me from love and monogamy
变性的经历好像让我 被爱和夫妻制拒之门外
because I was supposedly born in the wrong body?
仅仅因为我 出生在了错误的身体里吗?
But it’s this type of structuring that has to be reframed
这种体制必须被修正
in order to let love in.
让爱能够进入其中
My body never betrayed me, and my body was never wrong.
我的身体从来没有背叛过我 我的身体也没有任何错误
It’s this restrictive, binary thinking on gender
是这种严格限制的性别二元思想
that said that I didn’t exist.
说这样的我不存在
But when we met, she loved me for exactly how I showed up.
但是当我们见面时 她爱我 爱我存在的方式
She would trace her fingers along the numb keloid scars
她用手指去追寻我最近手术
left by my top surgery.
留下的瘢痕
Scars that run from the middle
从胸部中间一直延续
of my chest all the way out to my outer torso.
到外躯干的伤疤
She said that these were reminders of my strength
她说这些是我的力量
and everything that I went through and nothing for me to be ashamed of.
我经历过的一切的见证 我不必为此感到耻辱
So sprinting towards her hand in marriage
所以以短跑冲刺的速度向她求婚
was the queerest thing that I could do.
是我做过的最奇怪的事
(Laughter)
(笑声)
It flew in the face of more conventional trajectories
但是当我们面对爱情与婚姻
of love and relationships,
的传统轨道
because God was never supposed to
因为上帝从来就不应该给
bless a union for folks like us,
像我们这样的人们爱的祝福
and the law was never supposed to recognize it. KKM:
法律也从不应该去认可它KKM:
So on May 5, 2014,
所以在2014年5月5号
just about three months after meeting online,
在网上认识三个月之后
we were married on the steps of City Hall in Manhattan,
我们在曼哈顿 市政厅的台阶上结婚了
and it was beautiful in every conceivable way.
从各个方面来看都十分美好
It’s safe to say that we reimagined some traditions,
保守的说 我们重构了一些传统
but we also kept some old ones that we worked in,
但是我们也保留了 一些老的 我们适用的
and we created something that worked for us.
我们创造了让我们 能彼此接受的方式
My bouquet and corsage was actually filled with wildflowers from Brooklyn —
我的花束和胸花都是 用布鲁克林的野花填补的-
also added in a little bit
还加上了一点点薰衣草
of lavender and sage to keep us grounded
和鼠尾草让我们保持平定
because we were so nervous.
因为我们太紧张了
And it was put together by a sweet sister healer friend of ours.
这一切都是由我们 可爱的姐妹医生朋友操办的
I never wanted a diamond ring,
我从来都不想要一枚钻戒
because conflict and convention are not my thing,
因为冲突和传统不是我的风格
so my ring is the deepest purple,
我的戒指是暗紫色的
like the color of my crown chakra,
就像我的皇冠脉轮的颜色
and set in place with my birthstones.
然后在中间镶上我的出生石
The gift of queerness is options.
我的身世也是一份选择的礼物
I never had to choose his last name,
我不必去选择他的姓氏
it was never an exception, but I did
这本是没有例外的事 但是我有的原因是
because I am my father’s bastard child,
我是父亲的私生子
someone who has always been an apology, a secret, an imposition.
我就是一个充满歉意的 秘密的 强加的存在
And it was incredibly freeing
能够去选择第一次 选择了我的男人的名字
to choose the name of a man who chose me first.
那种感觉是难以置信的放飞
(Applause) TM:
(掌声)TM:
So we told some family and some close friends,
所以当我们告诉家人和朋友
many of whom were still in disbelief as we took our vows. Fittingly,
他们中的许多 都难以置信我们宣了誓
we posted all of our wedding photos on Facebook,
确切的说 我们把结婚照 都放在了Facebook上
where we met — and Instagram, of course.
就是我们第一次相遇的地方—— 当然 还有Instagram然后
And we quickly realized
我们很快意识到
that our coming together was more
我们在一起不仅仅是
than just a union of two people,
两个人的结合
but was a model of possibility
而是给那些被贩售了谎言——
for the millions of LGBTQ folks
家庭和婚姻
who have been sold this lie that family
与他们天生对立—— 的同性恋
and matrimony is antithetical to who they are —
双性恋 和跨性别人群树立了一种可能性
for those of us who rarely get to see ourselves
给那些很少能在爱与幸福的瞬间里
reflected in love and happiness. KKM:
看到自己身影的人们树立了可能性KKM:
And the thing is,
事实上
absolutely we are marginalized because of our identities,
我们被边缘化 当然是因为我们的身份
but it also emboldens us to be the people that we are.
但这也使我们 有胆量去展现真实的自我
Queerness is our major key; blackness is our magic.
对性别认同感到疑惑是我们的钥匙; 黑暗是我们的魔法
It’s because of these things that we are able to be hopeful, open,
是因为这些东西 我们才能够变得充满希望
receptive and shape-shifting.
开放 善于接纳
These are the things that give us,
和转换形态是这些东西让我们成为了自己
and are such an incredible source of, our strength.
是我们神奇的力量之源
Our queerness is a source of that strength.
我们的性别认同疑惑 就是力量的源泉
I think of the words of Ottawa-based poet Brandon Wint:
我想起了渥太华诗人 布兰登・温特的话:
“Not queer like gay; queer like escaping definition.
“性别认同疑惑不仅仅是同性恋 而是一种好似被逃避的定义
Queer like some sort of fluidity and limitlessness all at once.
性别认同疑惑是一种 瞬间的流动性
Queer like a freedom too strange to be conquered.
无拘束感性别认同疑惑是一种 无法抗拒的自由力量
Queer like the fearlessness to imagine what love can look like,
性别认同疑惑 是敢于去想象爱的境界
and to pursue it.” TM:
并去追逐它的无畏精神 ”
We are part of a community of folks — Yeah,
TM:我们都是群体中的一部分-
that’s good right?
是吧 这是一件不错的事?
(Laughter)
(笑声)
We are part of a community
我们是这样的群体中的一员
of folks who are living their authentic selves
我们在性别线谱的任何位置
all along the gender spectrum,
活出真实的自己
despite the ubiquitous threat of violence,
不管那些无处不在的暴力胁迫
despite the undercurrent of anxiety that always is present
不管那些总是为 以自我方式生活的人们
for people who live on their own terms. Globally,
而存在的焦虑暗流
a transgender person is murdered every 21 hours.
从世界范围来说 每21个小时 就会有一名跨性别人士被谋杀
And the United States has had
而美国今年记录在案的
more trans murders on record this year
跨性别人群谋杀案
than any year to date. However,
达到历年最高值
our stories are much more than this rigid dichotomy
然而 我们的故事 远不只是这种力量与柔韧
of strength and resilience.
的严格二分法
We are expanding the human complexity on these margins,
我们在这些边缘位置 扩充人类的复杂性
and we are creating freedom on these margins. KKM:
我们在这些边缘位置创造自由KKM:
And we don’t have any blueprints.
我们没有所谓的蓝图
We’re creating a world that we have literally never seen before;
我们正在创造一个 我们从未见过的世界;
organizing families based on love and not by blood,
用爱 而不是鲜血去组建家庭
guiding by a compassion that so few of us have been shown ourselves.
用很少有人能够展现的 那种同情心做为引导
So many of us have not received love from our families —
我们中的很多人都没有 能够从家庭中得到爱——
have been betrayed by the people that we trust most.
被我们最信任的人所背叛
So what we do here is we create entirely new languages of love.
所以我们现在做的 就是为爱创造一种新语言
Ones that are about creating the space
是为我们真实的自我
for us to be our authentic selves
去创造空间
and not imposing this standard
而不是将男性与女性应该如何
of what masculinity or femininity is supposed to be. TM:
的标准强加于大众TM:
We are interested in love and inclusion
我们是想要把爱和包容
as a tool of revolutionary change, right?
作为革命性变革的工具
And the idea is simply,
对吧?想法其实很简单
if we drop all our preconceived notions
我们只要抛弃对于某人
about how somebody is supposed to be —
应该如何的先入为主的观念——
in their body, in their gender, in their skin —
他们的身体 他们的性别 他们的肤色——
if we take the intentional steps to unlearn these deep-seated biases
如果我们有意愿的去抛弃 这些根深蒂固的偏见
and create space for people to be self-determined,
为那些自我意志的人创造空间
and embrace who they are,
接受他们真实的自己
then we will definitely create a better world
我们就一定会创造一个
than the one we were born into.
比我们出生时的更好的世界
(Applause) KKM:
(掌声)KKM:
We want to mark this time in history
我们想在这里留下 存在过的印记
by leaving evidence of the fact that we were here.
去纪念这个历史的时刻
We open up little windows into our relationship
我们为我们的关系打开了一扇窗户
for our community to bear witness,
让我们的群体去见证
and we do this
我们这样做
because we want to make maps to the future
是为了给未来描绘图景
and not monuments to ourselves.
而不是为了给自己建碑
Our experience does not invalidate other peoples’ experience,
我们的经历并不能否定其他人的经验
but it should and necessarily does complicate this idea
但它应该 也必定会将爱
of what love and marriage are supposed to be. TM:
与婚姻的观念复杂化TM:
OK, now for all the talking,
好的 我们现在说了这么多
and inspiring, and possibility-modeling we’ve done, we’ve been nowhere near perfect.
做了这么多起人深思的事 建立了可能性的结构 但是我们离完美还很远
And we’ve had to hold a mirror up to ourselves.
我们必须给自己竖一面镜子
And I saw that I wasn’t always the best listener,
我预见到了 我并不总是最好的听众
and that my ego got in the way of our progress as a couple.
我的自我性也可能 阻碍我们夫妇的进步
And I’ve had to really assess these deep-seated, sexist ideas
我必须要去真正评估那些作为女性
that I’ve had
生活在这个
about the value of a woman’s experience in the world.
世界上的 深层次的 性别观念
I’ve had to reevaluate what it means to be
我必须要重审与我妻子结婚的意义
in allyship with my wife. KKM:
KKM:
And I had to remind myself
我也需要提醒我
of a lot of things, too.
自己很多事情
What it means to be hard on the issues,
什么才是真正的坚定办事
but soft on the person.
宽容待人
While we were writing this, we got into a massive fight.
当我们在撰写这次演讲稿时 我们发生了激烈的争辩
(Laughter)
(笑声)
For so many different reasons,
因为这么多不同的原因
but based on the content about our values and our lived experiences —
但是基于我们的价值观 和我们的生活经历——
and we were really hurt, you know?
我们真的伤到了彼此 你们知道吗?
Because what we do and how we love puts ourselves entirely on the line.
因为我们把所做的 我们爱的方式 投放在了极大的风险里
But even though the fight lasted
但是即使这场战斗持续
over the course of two days —
了两天之久——
(Laughter)
(笑声)
We were able to come back together to each other,
我们还是回到了彼此身边
and recommit to ourselves, to each other and to our marriage.
我们忠于自己 忠于彼此 忠于我们的婚姻
And that really yielded some of the most passionate parts
这带来了我们今天想在这里 和你们分享的
of what we share with you here today. TM:
最具激情的部分TM:
I have had to interrogate masculinity,
我必须要询问关于男子气概
which I think doesn’t happen enough.
我认为这还不足够
I’ve had to interrogate masculinity;
我必须要询问关于男子气概;
the toxic privileges
这种伴随男性本质而来的
that come with being a man don’t define me,
剧毒特权并不能定义我
but I have to be accountable for how it shows up
但是我必须要对每天出现在
in my life every day.
我生活中的男子气概负责
I have allowed my wife to do all
我让我的妻子去从事
of the emotional labor
打开情感信号通路的工作
of prying open the lines
那种时刻
of communication when I’d rather clam up and run away.
我宁愿选择沉默或是逃脱
(Laughter)
(笑声)
I’ve stripped away emotional support instead of facing my own vulnerabilities,
我揭去了感情支持 而不是面对自己的脆弱心灵
particularly around the heartbreaking miscarriage we suffered last year,
特别是去年 遭遇到心碎的流产之后
and I’m sorry for that.
我对此深感歉意有时候
Sometimes as men, we get to take the easy way out.
作为一个男人 我们总想简单摆脱
And so my journey as a trans person is about reimagining masculinity.
所以我跨性别的经历 也是 对男性特质的重新思考
About creating a manhood that isn’t measured
关于创造一种不是由权力
by the power it wields, by the entitlements afforded to it,
它被赋予的权利 或是各种
or any simulacrum of control that it can muster,
意义上的控制力所测定的
but works in tandem with femininity, and is guided by my spirit. KKM:
而是由与女性柔情的协调 被个人精神所指引的KKM:
Y’all…
嗯……
(Applause)
(掌声)
And this has created the space for my femininity to flourish
这也为我创造了空间 以一种从未经历过的方式
in a way I had never experienced before.
使我的女性特质蓬勃发展
He never is threatened by my sexuality,
他从不会被我的性别取向所威胁
he never polices what I wear or how I act.
他也从不限制我的穿着或是行为我烧饭
I cook but he does way more of the cleaning than I do.
但是他比我 做更多的清洁工作
And when we’re rushing to get out of the house
当我们急着要出门的时候
and we have so much to handle, he handles everything,
我们会有很多要做的东西 他会处理好一切
so I have time to do my hair and makeup.
这样我就有时间去打扮头发 化妆
(Laughter)
(笑声)
He understands that this is my armor,
他明白这是我的武器
and he never treats femininity as
他从不把女性特质作为肤浅的
though it is frivolous or superficial,
表面的东西对待
and this, and him —
而这
he grows my experience of gender every single day. TM:
还有他——他每天都帮我增长了对于性别的认知TM:
I love to watch her get dressed in the morning.
我喜欢在清晨欣赏她穿衣
Watching her in the closet,
看着她在壁橱里
looking for something comfortable and colorful, and tight,
搜寻一些舒适的 色彩斑斓的 贴身的
and safe —
安全感的衣物——
(Laughter)
(笑声)
But it’s challenging to watch her negotiate her decisions
但是观看她如何与自我斗争 去寻找那种不醒目
looking for something that’s going
但又要同时表现出
to get the least amount of attention,
她是一名充满活力的
but at the same time be an expression
性感的女性的衣服
of the vibrant and sexy woman she is.
是一件颇具挑战性的事
And all I want to do
而我想做的只是
is celebrate her for her beauty,
去祝贺她的美丽
and the things that make her beautiful and special and free,
那些让她变得美丽 特别 自由的东西
from her long acrylic nails, to her uncompromising black feminism.
从她那长长的塑料指甲 到她那毫不妥协的黑人女性特质
(Applause) KKM:
(掌声)KKM:
I love you. TM: I love you.
我爱你 TM:我爱你
(Laughter) KKM:
(笑声)KKM:
There are so many queer and trans people
在我们之前 还有那么多的
who have come before us, whose stories we will never get to hear.
性别认同疑惑者和跨性别人群 我们却没有机会去听见他们的故事
We constantly experience this retelling of history
我们不断地看到像我们这样的人群
where we are conspicuously left out.
被排除在外
And it’s really hard to not see ourselves there.
但是想忽略我们自身真的很难所以
And so living out loud for us is about that representation.
我们大声活出自我 就是一种体现
It’s about having possibility models,
这是关于我们可能性的模型
and having hope that love is part of our inheritance
关于爱能够成为 我们这个世界的遗产的期望
in this world, too. TM:
TM:
The possibility that we are practicing
我们正在塑造的这种可能性
is about reinventing time, love and institutions.
是关于重新定义时间
We are creating a future of multiplicity.
爱和制度的我们正在创造一个多样性的未来
We are expanding the spectrum of gender and sexuality,
我们正在扩大性别和性取向的线谱
imagining ourselves into existence,
想象我们自身存在的可能
imagining a world where gender is self-determined and not imposed,
想象一个性别是由自身决定的 而非被强加的世界
and where who we are is a kaleidoscope of possibility
想象一个不受伪装成科学 或正义的狭隘观念限制的
without the narrow-minded limitations masquerading as science or justice.
我们能成为万千种可能性的世界
(Applause) KKM:
(掌声)KKM:
And I can’t lie:
我不能说谎;
it is really, really hard.
因为那真的
It is hard to stand in the face of bigotry
真的很难我很难站在偏执的眼前
with an open heart and a smile on my face.
携着开放的心和满脸的微笑
It is really hard to face
要一边直面着存在
the injustice that exists in the world,
在这个世界上的不公平
while still believing in the ability of people to really change.
一边能够坚信人们能够 改变的能力
That takes an enormous amount of faith and dedication.
真的很难这将花费巨大的信仰与执念
And beyond that, marriage is hard work.
除此之外 婚姻也是很困难的事
(Laughter)
(笑声)
Piles of dirty socks on the floor,
在地板上成堆的脏袜子
more boring sports shows than I ever thought possible —
远超过想象的无聊体育节目——
(Laughter)
(笑声)
And fights that bring me to tears when it feels
那些使我流泪的争辩 有时让我感到
like we’re not speaking the same language.
我们根本 就是鸡同鸭讲
But there is not a day that goes by
但是 在过去的每一天里
where I am not so grateful to be married to this man;
我都为嫁给了这个男人而感激;
where I’m not so grateful for the possibility of changing minds,
我都为能够有机会改变观念
and rewarding conversations, and creating a world where love belongs to us all.
做有价值的谈话 创造一个爱属于我们的世界而感激
I think about our acronym: LGBTQ2SIA.
我想了一下形容我们的 首字母缩写简称: LGBTQ2SIA
A seemingly endless evolution of self and a community,
一个看似无止境的 自我与群体的演化
but also this really deep desire not to leave anyone behind.
但同时也是不想 留下任何人的深深的期望
We’ve learned how to love each other,
我们学习了如何爱彼此
and we’ve committed to loving each other throughout changes to gender
我们学会了在经历 性别转变 精神改变的过程中
and changes in spirit.
忠于彼此的爱
And we learned this love in our chat rooms,
我们在聊天室里 俱乐部里
in our clubs, in our bars and in our community centers.
酒吧里 社区中心里学到了这份爱
We’ve learned how to love each other for the long haul.
我们学会了如何一直爱着彼此
TM & KKM: Thank you.
TM&KKM:谢谢
(Applause)
(掌声)

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lwcvhh4pLjE

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