Narcissism is a serious personality disorder
that has many damaging effects.
It seems like common sense to stay away
from those who exhibit excessive selfish behavior,
but what if they’re your own parents?
Here are Seven Subtle Signs of Narcissistic Parenting.
1. They’re self-centered
and make you join the show too.
Everyone is self-cautious and cares to
a certain degree what other people think about them,
that’s human nature.
But do you ever wonder why your parents
act so differently at home than they’re out in public?
Even for narcissists, their slips and the mask comes off.
Narcissistic parents take pride in
flaunting their social status, physical appearance,
material possessions and accomplishments.
But when they no longer have an audience
once they pull up in the driveway,
they stop with the nice act.
They either criticize
or talk about others behind their back.
2. You can’t receive gifts
without feeling like there’re strings attached.
Giving presents is supposed to be a selfless deed.
It’s about celebrating the other person’s
who’s receiving the gift.
不论是生日 毕业 或者没什么特别的理由
Whether it’s on their birthday, graduation or just because.
So why does it feel like there are consequences
when you receive one from a narcissist?
The narcissistic parent knows how to guilt trip you
if you don’t love or use their gift.
And when it comes to buying presents for them,
forget having to brainstorm,
they usually tell you or demand
for what they want in return.
3. When you try to set boundaries,
they get offensive.
If there’s one thing a narcissistic parent loves
Because treating the child like an equal
would mean they aren’t superior or above them.
If you live with a narcissistic parent,
some of these might sound familiar.
they go through your room without your permission
and throw away some of your possessions.
They dictate your extracurricular activities
or classes you can take.
And they set unrealistic expectations on you
without hearing what you have to say first.
But when you do stand up for yourself,
they get easily hurt or are offensive
and use excuses like, it was just spring cleaning
or I’m just doing what’s best for you.
4. You feel like you’re their puppet
more than you are their child.
Dress-up and make-believe is fun as a kid,
but narcissistic mothers take that
to a whole another serious level.
Patients of narcissistic parents
were interviewed by psychologists
and one of them said her mom used to love
dolling her up in cute dresses
even though she was a tomboy by nature.
She believe that abuses her mom’s self-worth
when she will receive compliments for her parents.
Under eyes of a narcissistic parent,
the child acts as a medium they can live through.
This is how the child’s individuality becomes diminished,
replacing it with their own selfish desires.
5. They feel hurt when you don’t include them
in your decisions.
Psychotherapist Daniel Sobel says that
a narcissistic parent operates from self-protection,
and if the ego is bruised
or they feel the decision was made they could not control,
they become cruel, blaming and offensive.
A healthy parent decides
how many sweets their child can have after dinner.
But a narcissistic parent will want to govern everything,
what kind of career you can have, who you can date,
and when you can move out.
Nothing scares them more
than when you start thinking for yourself
and no longer need their validation.
六 没有父母 你感觉自己无法做出明智的决定
6. You feel like you can’t make good decisions without them.
Narcissistic parenting creates a
codependent relationship between the parent and child.
This can make the child anxious and
feel lost without the parents help.
But that’s exactly what they want.
Often, the child will grow feeling confused and invalidated
when their thoughts and feelings were ignored.
Often, the child will grow up feeling confused and invalidated
when their thoughts and feelings were ignored.
Although going through puberty
is already a dizzying experience,
a narcissistic parent will make sure
to tear down your self-identity too,
leaving you feeling more helpless than ever.
By doing this, they make you depend on them
to feel your own self-worth.
七 他们知道如何扭转局面 扮演受害者
7. They know how to turn the table and play the victim.
No matter how reasonable or logical your argument is,
the narcissistic parent will find a way
to manipulate you and point fingers.
Narcissists never take responsibility for their actions
and marginalize your needs and feelings.
This is how they play mind games with you.
But they get off easy
because they play their victim card well.
Not anymore though,
now that you know about these signs,
you no longer have to participate in the cruelty.
We hope this video was helpful.
Do you struggle with narcissistic parents?
We also made a video on
16 just effects of narcissistic parenting.
Please be sure to check it out.
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