Children who come from dysfunctional families
learn to take on roles in order to cope
with toxic behaviors in their household.
Such upbringings affect their treats and habits they carry into adulthood.
Those who come from a background of alcohol, or drug abuse
experienced a turbulent childhood and
end up playing certain roles to alleviate the sadness,
悲伤 羞耻 愤怒的能力
humiliation or anger they feel.
Family dynamics said include other compulsive behavior
像赌博 暴食 过度严厉 宗教的态度
such as gambling or overeating, overly strict and religious attitudes,
narcissism and physical, emotional or sexual abuse
may also affect children to take on the same roles.
People may identify with more than just one role
when they grow up in chaotic households.
These are five types of children from toxic families.
1. The hero or responsible child.
The hero or responsible child is wise and mature beyond their years.
Their self sufficient perfectionist overachieving and seemingly composed.
In reality, though, they suffer silently
and carry the burden of sadness from their parents toxic behavior.
They’re afraid of becoming their like parents,
so they learn to be the exact opposite.
For example, if the hero has a narcissistic and abusive parent,
they usually try to be the favorite child,
relying on good performance in order to receive love.
2. The scapegoat or troublemaker.
The scapegoat or troublemaker is angry and defensive.
At school, the scapegoat is typically
the leader within their social group
and often get in trouble.
Because that’s how they learn to get the most attention,
but because they’ve built walls around themselves out of fear,
their relationship with others may be superficial.
Toxic parents are usually extremely ashamed of them,
as they try to convey their situation
by acting out family problems that are usually ignored at home.
But beneath that hard exterior, they’re very emotionally sensitive.
They are either the loud rebellious type
or the one easily picked on
and since they’ve been hurt by their abusive parent,
they can be self-destructive.
3. The lost child or dreamer.
The lost child or dreamer is invisible within their family
and tries to cope with the family’s struggles
by disappearing and reading books,
daydreaming or watching movies.
They rarely get in trouble.
Because everyone sees them as a good kid.
It’s assumed that they also
have a good healthy life at home.
The lost child is typically very shy and
enjoys having a lot of space and solitude,
causing others to view them as loners.
Since their more withdrawn,
they struggled to develop important social skills and relationships with others
and often suffer from low self-esteem.
4. The mascot or class clown.
The mascot or class clown is usually known as the cute one.
They’re always ready to lighten the mood
with jokes or entertaining shows.
Their dysfunctional family makes them feel powerless,
so they try to cope by breaking the anger
tension and conflict with fun and humor.
Most mascot children have a friendly disposition
and are described as overly nice.
Mascot children enjoy helping others.
Because it distracts them from their own problems.
Beneath their cheerful demeanor, however,
they usually suffer from low self-esteem,
anxiety and depression,
developing workaholic tendencies to make up for their insecurities.
They also find it painful to
ask for help when they are hurt.
So they put on a brave smile for the world.
5. The enabler or caretaker.
The enabler or caretaker is typically married to an addict,
but children can also take on this role.
They listen to and console the addict
while encouraging other families not to react negatively.
Because the enabler doesn’t know how to cope with toxic behavior,
they make excuses for the addict alcohol or
drug problems and deny such problems exist,
masking the families downfalls
to make sure the public sees them as a happy
Do you identify with one or more of these 5 types?
Is there any advice you’d like to provide
to those who come from toxic families?
Feel free to share your stories in the comments below.
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