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提升生活质量的4种思维方式

4 Mindset Changes That Massively Improved My Life

Hey, what’s going on, guys?
嗨 大家好!
So, this week’s video is going to be
本周的视频
a little bit different than most other videos I have done on this channel.
和本频道的大部分视频有点不一样
Because for the most part of the videos
因为在大部分视频里
that I do have a pretty set-in-stone topic.
我都会有一个相对固定的主题
I try to keep a pretty narrow focus on whatever I’m talking about.
尽量精确地集中在我讨论事情上
but for the last four months
但在过去的4个月里
I’ve been keeping a note in EverNote,
我一直在印象笔记上记笔记
just called five self-improving tips.
称之为《自我提升的五条建议》
And I put that number there arbitrarily.
这个数字五是我随便写的
But I came up with something that I thought was interesting to me.
但我突然想到了些我认为很有趣的事情
They were just something that I felt was like mindset change I made a long time ago.
一些我很久之前就改变了的思维方式
And it’s really improved my life.
它们真的改善了我的生活
And that gave me an idea for a video
同时这也让我产生了制作一个视频的想法
where I’ll just sort of list out some of the subtle or maybe not-so-subtle mindset changes just
我会列出一些我在过去十年或高中毕业后所做的
that I’ve made over the last decade or so since I graduated high school,
微妙或者不那么微妙的思维转变
that have really improved things for me on a daily basis.
它们对我的日常生活有很大的帮助
And I was gonna wait until I had a longer list to
我本来想等到有一张更长的清单后
do a video on these sort of mindset hacks,
再来做一个类似思维改造的视频
but I think the four that I have now which I’ve just sort of added over time as I thought about them
但我想积累的现有四种思维方式
make up a pretty good list.
已经足够作为这期视频内容了
So today we’re gonna go over four mindset hacks
那么 今天我们就来谈谈这四种思维改造方式
or mindset changes that I’ve made slowly over the past 10 or so years
它们是我过去十年左右的时间里慢慢发生的思维转变
that’ve really improved my life.
实实在在地改善了我的生活
And if you can adopt even just one of these into your own life,
如果你能在生活中运用任何一条
I think you’re gonna notice a marked improvement as well.
你肯定也会有显而易见的进步
So let’s get into it.
那就开始吧
Mindset hack number one is
思维改造第一条是
to become okay with being the worst person in the room,
不介意自己是全场最差
and by that I mean, like, the worst person
我这句话的意思是指
at whatever skill you’re trying out.
在你所有尝试的技能上 都是最差的
This fear of being labeled as the worst person in the room
害怕被贴上“全场最垃圾”的标签
or of looking bad in comparison to everyone else
或怕输给其他人的恐惧心理
keeps people from pursuing the things they want to do,
会阻止人们去追求他们想做的事
or it keeps them from increasing the difficulty
不敢增加事情的难度
or moving to the next level in something they’re already pursuing.
不敢对自己已达到的能力再加码挑战
And if you can become okay with being bad at something or comparatively bad,
但如果你不介意自己某些事做得差或者不太好
or if you can become okay with being worse than everyone else in your peer group,
不介意输给同龄的伙伴们
then you start to compete in a higher league.
那你就跨入了更高层去竞争
And when you are the worst person in the room,
你作为最不优秀的人
that means that there’s nowhere for you to go but up.
意味着你只能向前看
And everyone else around you is somebody who you can learn from.
你身边的人都是你可以学习的对象
So the example of putting this mindset into action
有个运用了这一思维方式的例子
that immediately comes to mind for me is
立刻浮现在我脑海
from last summer when I started doing downhill mountain biking.
去年夏天 我开始做山地自行车运动
Now downhill mountain biking, especially the lift access version where
山地自行车运动速降版本
you literally put your bike and yourself on a ski lift, and you go up to the top of a mountain and ride down
你和自行车都会被放在滑雪缆车上被吊到 上你要骑下来
is a pretty difficult and risky discipline in mountain biking.
这个规则在山地自行车运动中是非常困难和极具挑战的
In fact, my friend Martin actually broke
事实上 我的朋友马丁
his finger doing it back in the fall.
在返程中摔了一跤 折了手指
I started this in the summer,
我从今年夏天开始这项运动
and I started off being pretty bad.
一开始骑得很烂
I noticed that all these people kept passing
我注意到这条路上的人
me up on the trails.
都超过了我
And I kind of felt self-conscious about my abilities at first.
于是我对自己的能力有些自知之明了
Then I realized that if I just challenged myself
但之后我意识到 如果我只是挑战自己
to follow these people who were better than me,
并追随这些比我做得好的人
I actually would get better more quickly.
我其实应该会进步得更快
And I found that this actually did happen.
后来我发现的确是这样
I was more afraid to do things like go off jumps or take trails at higher
speed when I was alone,
当我独自一人时 会害怕进行跳跃或者高速骑行
but when I was following somebody,
但当我追随某人时
there was, like, this competitive instinct that kicked in.
竞争的本能就被唤醒了
I found myself pushing myself a little bit further
我发现我在逼自己一点点进步
and really challenging myself to keep pace
不断挑战自我
with this other person who was better than me.
去赶上那个比我优秀的人
And this mindset actually paid off on the very first day that I went mountain biking,
这种思维方式在我初学山地自行车时 就非常有效
’cause I went with my cousin to a bike park in Boulder Colorado
因为有天我和我表兄去了 卡罗拉多布尔德的一个骑行公园
and there was a jump that I just could not get myself to do.
曾有个我从未跳跃成功的障碍
Every single time I would go up to the jump,
每次我都骑到障碍上
I would hit the brakes, I would stop.
又赶紧刹车停下来
Then I’d have to take my bike, lift it up,
然后不得不下车 举着车
and walk down, pass the jump.
步行过障碍点
I was just too scared to do it.
我真的太害怕了
And my cousin, who was a little bit better
而我的表哥
at mountain biking than I was,
山地自行车骑得比我好一点点
not a ton, but a little bit,
其实也没好多少
said, “Alright, this time we’re gona go.”
他说好了 我们该出发了
“You’re gonna follow me.”
你要跟紧我哦
“I’m going to hit this jump,
我要冲过这个跳跃障碍了
and you are going to hit it with me.”
你和我一起吧
And watching him do it, and knowing there was an expectation
看着他成功跨越障碍
that I was going to have to rise to the challenge
我内心也有了一个击败挑战的期待
because he was doing it as well forced me to do it.
因为他的成功迫使我去大胆尝试
And I actually hit that jump, and afterwards it became easy.
我也确实成功跨越了 之后这就变得轻而易举了
So again, if you can become comfortable
所以说 如果你可以接受
with being the worst person in the room,
自己是全场最差这个事实
even if it’s a self-perception kind of thing,
即便这只是个心理作用
then you are going to allow yourself
你都能让自己
to compete in a higher league.
跨入到更高级别的竞争中去
You’re gonna expose yourself to people who are more skilled
让自己被更有才的人的影响
and who can bring you up to speed more quickly.
他们能帮你更快地进步
And one last thing that I do wanna know when it comes to this mindset is that
最后通过这种思维方式我懂得了
for the most part, people are kind of self-absorbed.
大部分情况 人们都是以自我为中心的
So say, if you go to the gym
比如说 如果你去健身房
and you are out of shape or
你身材走样了
you are lifting the least amount of weight out of the gym,
在健身房举起的重量最轻
people aren’t going to make fun of you,
人们不会来嘲笑你
because they’re there to do their own thing.
因为他们在做自己的事
They aren’t there to judge you.
他们不是来评判你的
So just keep that in mind when you start a new hobby
所以记住当你开始新的爱好
or you start trying to improve yourself in any way.
或是以任何方式提升自我时
If you’re around other people who are doing the same thing
若身边的人也在做相同的事
they’re probably focused on
他们很可能正专注于
their own goals and their own efforts.
他们自己的目标以及付出的努力
All right, mindset hack number two is
好了 思维改造第二条
to treat real-life goals kind of like video game levels.
把现实生活中的一个个目标看做游戏关卡
And the reason that I have this on the list
要有这种思维的原因是
is that when we play video games
我们玩游戏的时候
at least, I play video games
起码 我在打游戏时
I am 100 % okay with dying or failing,
我完全能接受死亡或失败
because I know that in just a few seconds after dying,
这是因为我明白死了几秒后
I am going to restart the level.
这一关可以重来
I’m going to try again.
我就可以再试一次
And the process of dying over and over and over again
而且一次又一次的死亡经历
in some cases is part of the experience.
在某些意义上来说是经验
It’s part of the fun.
也是快乐的一部分
One of my absolute favorite video games
全世界我最喜欢的电子游戏之一
in the world is called Celeste, which is,
叫做《蔚蓝》
in my opinion, one of the best platforms ever made.
在我看来 这是有史以来制作得最好的游戏之一
And if you go look at my death stats for every level in the game,
如果你看了我游戏里每一关的死亡统计
they are ridiculous.
会觉得数据很荒谬
In fact, I think in one of the levels
实际上 每一个关卡
I have over 1,000 deaths.
我都死了上千次
But because I’ve gone through that level and died 1,000 times,
不过就是因为我在那关死了上千次
I can now basically speed-run it,
现在我基本能快速通关
and the process of doing so looks really cool,
这样做看起来特别酷
and it’s really fun to do.
也真的很有趣
And I know that all those deaths
我知道所有的死亡
are part of learning process.
都是学习过程的一部分
Every single time I made a mistake,
每次我犯错
I got a little bit better,
我就会进步一点点
I got a little bit more knowledgeable about what to do in that situation.
也更了解这种情况下我应该做什么
I made an adjustment.
我会做出调整
Now in real life,
现实生活中
a lot of times, we feel like we have to
很多时候我们觉得
get things right in the first time,
必须在第一次就把事情做好
whether it be out of embarrassment,
有可能是出于怕尴尬
or whether it be out of the fear of wasting too much time.
或是怕浪费时间
But that’s not how things are.
可惜事与愿违
It’s just like a video game.
生活就像电子游戏
If we can treat things as a learning process,
如果我们把任何事都看作学习的过程
even if they’re failures, then we’d become more open to going through that learning process,
即使失败了 也会更释怀
and we become more able to gain those skills.
这样我们才更可能习得那些技能
The fear of failure is something that really holds people back.
对于失败的恐惧会让人停滞不前
So if you can start viewing yourself as a video game character
所以如果你开始把自己当成游戏中的角色
at least insofar as you’re allowed to fail certain things,
至少你允许自己可以做错一些事
maybe not allowed to fall into pits of spikes,
关键时刻或许就不会掉链子
but if you can fail certain things,
你如果可以在某些事上失败
then you’re going to sort of move past that mental roadblock.
就会帮你从某种程度上克服心理障碍
Mindset hack number three is to become okay
思维改造第三点就是
with confronting harsh realities or bad news.
坦然面对残酷的现实或糟糕的消息
And this is a mindset hack that I got from the book
这种思维是我从
Good to Great by Jim Collins.
吉姆·柯林斯的《好上加好》里面学到的
This is a fantastic business book.
这是本很棒的商业书刊
I think anybody who is in the professional world
我认为任何一个专业人士
or an entrepreneur should read this book.
或者企业家都应该看看
And there is a quote
我想引用
from an executive of the company Pitney Bowes, his name is Fred Purdue,
皮特尼·伯维斯公司总经理弗雷德·朴尔德 的一句话
that really stuck with me after I read this book.
看完这本书后 这句话真的打动了我
In fact, I think this might be the concept that stuck
事实上 我认为这句话是
with me more than any other from this book.
整本书里最打动我的
And I want to read the quote to you here.
在此想分享给大家
The quote goes,
这句话是
“When you turn over rocks
翻开石头后
and look at all the squiggly things underneath,
你会看到石头底下蠕动的生物
you can either put the rock down
你可以选择把石头放回去
or you can say, ‘my job is to turn over rocks and look at the squiggly things,’
或者你可以说“无论我有多么恐惧 我都要翻开石头
even if what you see can scare the hell out of you.”
然后正视这些蠕动的生物”
The sad thing is, a lot of people would rather avoid looking at bad news,
可悲的是 很多人都倾向于对坏消息充耳不闻
avoid looking at harsh realities than confront them.
抗拒直面残酷的现实
And this causes a lot of problems.
这会导致许多问题
Some people know they probably didn’t do well on the test,
有些人觉得自己可能考砸了
so they avoid looking at the test results
就不去看考试结果
until they realize they’ve been kicked out of school.
直到发现自己被退学了
Or some people know their bank account balance is probably
或者也有些人知道自己的银行账户余额
a little bit lower than they’d like it to be,
可能比想象中的少
so they just don’t look at it
也不去查查账户
until there ‘s an overdraft
直到超支
or until there’s a bill that isn’t paid.
或者没钱支付账单了
In our quest to avoid pain,
我们逃避痛苦
we often avoid looking at things that cause us mental pain,
总是拒绝直视让我们内心痛苦的事
just because they are, like, the bearer of bad news,
只因为它们是坏消息的信使
the harbinger of bad news to come.
是暴风雨来临的前奏
But the people who are truly successful are the ones
但真正成功的人
who can confront these harsh realities,
敢于直面残酷的现实
because when you do,
因为当你这么做
when you don’t shy away from them
当你不再躲躲闪闪
or pretend they don’t exist,
或是视而不见的时候
then you can, after you get over the emotional pain, the shock of seeing them,
克服情绪上的痛苦和现实的打击后 你就可以
formulate a plan for dealing with them.
构想出解决它们的方案
So become okay with confronting these harsh realities.
所以直面残酷的现实吧
Yes, it’s tough.
是的 是不容易
Yes, you kind of never really get totally used to it,
是的 你不可能完全习惯
’cause you always have that little part of your brain
因为你大脑的某个部分
that just sort of wants to go do something else,
总想去做别的事
but you have to become able to push through that mental resistance.
但你必须学会克服内心的阻碍
Finally, I want to talk about the one mindset hack
最后 我想谈谈个人认为
that I think has improved my life more than any other.
最提高我生活质量的一个思维改造
And it’s simply building a sort of background loop in my head
在脑中构建这样一种思维并不难
that constantly asks where am I wrong
那就是不停地问自己错哪儿了
or how am I wrong?
或是如何犯错的
I’m always looking for my own blind spots.
我经常会寻找自己的盲点
This mindset hack was kind of forced upon me
这个思维改造让我时刻监督自己
when I was a teenager when a girlfriend of mine
当我十几岁时 有个女朋友
actually broke up with me,
事实上她和我分手了
and she told me the reason that she left me was that
她说离开我的原因是
I always had to be right.
我必须永远是对的
Every time we’d get into an argument
每次我们吵架时
or even just a conversation
甚至只是聊下天
I always had it to be the person with the last word.
我总希望话语权在我手上
I didn’t really realize this at the time,
那时的我还没有意识到
but when that happened,
但当它发生时
the pain of being dumped was so great
我才发现被抛弃的痛苦实在太大了
that I was forced to look at my actions,
它迫使我不得不正视自己的行为
to look at the way that I thought.
正视自己思考的方式
And I realized that, yes,
然后我意识到了 没错
I did have this implicit assumption that I was right in all things
我潜意识里的确总认为自己是对的
even if I would have never admitted it even to myself.
即使我从未承认过
And I think a lot of people are like this,
并且我觉得很多人都是这样
especially people who are generally successful
特别是那些
at a lot of the things they do.
做什么都成功的人
There’s this sort of hubris or pride that
我们的思想
develops in the back of our minds and
日渐傲慢
sort of squashes any humility we have.
直到把谦虚吞没
And it causes us to miss a lot of our blind spots
傲慢让我们忽视自身的盲点
or to assume things that are true.
并认为自己做的事都是对的
So even though that experience was very painful,
所以即使过程很痛苦
I count it as a blessing,
我却把它当成一种福气
because it sort of forced me to develop this assumption
因为这迫使我去假设
that I’m probably wrong in a lot of areas.
可能很多地方我都做得不对
Even when I think that I’m right about something,
即使有时候我觉得某些事上自己是对的
there might be a blind spot.
也可能还有盲点
There might be something that I’m missing.
可能还有我忽视的事
So I ask myself, what could I possibly be missing?
所以我问自己 我可能忽视了什么呢?
And a lot of times I try to put myself in the shoes of the person that I’m talking to
并且有很多次我尝试站在与我对话的人的角度
and ask, what is their perspective on this?
问自己 他们对这件事的观点是什么?
What could they see that I might not be seeing?
他们看到了什么我看不到的呢?
Now I don’t think you have to go through
现在我不认为你一定要经历
a super painful experience to develop this ability.
一件特别痛苦的事儿来培养这一能力
And I would say that a lot of its refinement
我觉得很多思想的转变
came from reading books like Harry Potter and the Methods
来自于阅读像《哈利波特》《理性之道》
of Rationality or Thinking Fast and Slow by Daniel Kahneman
丹尼尔·凯恩曼的《快思考慢思考》这类书
or even some of the individual blog posts over on LessWrong.com
甚至LessWrong.com上的个人博客
which was one of the original resources where
这个网站是我开始学习人类的理性
I started learning about human rationality, and learning to
关注自身的困惑和盲点
notice my own confusion and notice my blind spots.
的最初来源之一
Regardless of how you go about developing this ability,
不管你怎么去培养这一能力
once you do get better at using it
一旦你可以更好地运用它
and making it more habitual
将其变成日常习惯
you’re gonna become a much more likable person,
你将成为一个更讨喜的人
because people will see you as not arrogant,
因为人们认为你不会骄傲自大
as open to noticing your own flaws and your own blind spots.
你会注意到自己的缺点和盲点
And aside from that,
除此之外
it’s also gonna make you a better problem solver.
这种思维能让你更善于解决问题
As Barbara Oakley talks about in her book A Mind of Numbers,
正如芭芭拉·奥克莱在自己所著《数字思维》
there’s this concept called einstellung,
所说的思维定势理念
where the work that you’ve done to learn something earlier can
即从先前工作中学到的知识
sort of block the ability for you to consider new information,
会在某种程度上影响你接受新信息的能力
because you have these very well-worn neural patterns
因为原有的思维模式
that are pretty difficult to break out of.
相当难打破
But if you can build this metacognitive skill
但如果你能养成不断挑战个人理念
of constantly challenging your beliefs and looking for your blind spots,
以及寻找自身盲点的元认知技能
you’re gonna be far less susceptible to this einstellung.
就不太容易受到思维定势的影响
So going forward, start tying to consciously challenge your beliefs.
所以努力向前吧 开始尝试自发地挑战自己的信念
Start asking yourself, how could I be wrong?
开始问问自己 我会怎样犯错?
And in doing so you’re gonna become a much better problem solver.
这么做能让你成为更好的问题处理者
Of course, if you want to boost those problem-solving skills
当然 若想提高解决问题的能力
even further, then the best way to do it is
或更进一步 最好的方法就是
to practice problem solving on a daily basis.
练习解决日常基础的问题
And a great place to do this is at Brilliant.org.
Brilliant.org.是个让你练习的好地方
Brilliant is an excellent learning platform
Brilliant是个很棒的学习平台
for anyone wanting to improve your skills
适用于任何想要提高数学 科学
in math, science, and computer science.
以及计算机科学技能的人
And they take a very active approach to building all their courses
他们用一种灵活的方式创建课程
meaning that whether you want to take a course
这意味着无论你是想要
on calculus or on math for quantitative training in finance
学习微积分还是金融定量培训的数学课程
or on computer memory, computer algorithms,
或计算机内存 计算机算法
or gravitational physics, you’re gonna find yourself immediately thrown into
或引力物理学 你会发现自己
challenging problems that stretch your problem-solving capabilities
马上就会投入有挑战性的问题中去
and stretch that lateral-thinking ability
从而提升解决问题
that we talked about in earlier videos
和之前视频提到的横向思维的能力
Additionally, you’re not gonna find yourself bored
除此之外你不会觉得
by tons of introductory lecture material
大量的入门级材料枯燥无味
you’re getting right into the problems right away.
因为你会立刻得到很多问题
So your interest in the subject is going to
所以整个过程中你对
remain high the entire time
这门课程兴趣盎然
and you’re gonna learn much more efficiently as well.
学习也更有效率
Now, in addition to the library in-depth courses,
现在 除了图书馆深度课程外
they’ve also release a new feature called Daily Problems
他们也新增了课程《日常问题》
where every single day, they are releasing new problems
每天他们会推送新问题
that can whet your appetite
来满足你的需求
and get you interested in new subjects such as how prehistoric humans tracked the time,
让你对史前人类是如何监测时间
or how you can cut a mobius strip in half.
或如何将莫比乌斯带一分为二等课程感兴趣
These problems take about five minutes every single day
每天花5分钟思考这些问题
so you can build them into a habbit
你就会渐渐形成习惯
and not only do they improve your problem solving abilities even further
这不仅会提高你解决问题的能力
they can get you interested in new topics that you hadn’t considered before.
还会让你对先前从未考虑的主题感兴趣
so if you want to try out that daily problems feature
所以如果你想试用《日常问题》特辑
or you wanna dig into one of their more in-depth courses
或想挖掘更深入的课程
so learning right now, you can go over the
现在就开始吧
Brilliant.org/thomasfrank to start learning for free.
去Brilliant.org/thomasfrank开始免费学习
and if you’re one of the first 83 people to
而且前83名
sign up with that link you’re also gonna get 20%
点击链接注册的人
off your annual premium subscription.
年度订阅费打8折
Big thanks to Brilliant for sponsoring this video
非常感谢Brilliant对本视频的赞助
and being big support of my channel.
以及对我的频道的大力支持
Hopefully you guys enjoyed this video
希望你们喜欢这个视频
if did, definitely give it a like
如果喜欢 一定要点赞哦
you can also subcribe right there to you get new videos
你也可以通过这里的订阅按钮
every single week on this channel.
获得这个频道每周的新视频的提醒
Plus, go right there to get a free copy of my book on how to earn better grades.
还可以从这里得到我的书籍赠送本《如何考高分》
you can follow me on instagram @TOMFRANKLY
你也可以在ins上关注我 @TOMFRANKLY
or last but not least,
还有最后一件事
click right here to get one more video on this channel.
点击这里观看本频道的另一个视频
Thanks so much for watching,
感谢收看
and I will see you in the next one.
我们下个视频见

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视频概述

你愿意承认自己是“全场最差”的人吗?你觉得自己一直是对的吗?托马斯教你告别思维定势,找到全新的自己!

听录译者

橘苓

翻译译者

审核员

审核员1024

视频来源

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PLGNGsJ5L40

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